Superman Returns Mountain Dew Slurpees

Another stupid promotion. From x-entertainment, "My obsession with movie-branded 7-Eleven Slurpees continues with the chain's new Superman Returns Mountain Dew Slurpees. I was tipped off to their impending arrival a few months ago, actually; the studio's list of licensees is enormous, and while I doubt we'll see many things as cool as official Superman Slurpees, you can bet on enough new red and blue junk to give your spare bedroom a theme.

I can't say that the promotional push has made me any less apathetic towards Superman, but he's certainly in my thoughts more than ever, even if it's just by extension of thinking about soft drinks and new Cap'n Crunch cereal with Superman shield pieces. (Coming soon to the blog.) While X-Men: The Last Stand was only good enough to get character likenessesesesses on the cups for an otherwise unrelated Sunkist Orange Slurpee, Superman gets two new flavors all his own -- "Kryptonite Ice," and "Arctic Burst." Okay, so maybe "Arctic Burst" is more just a coincidence, but that's not how they're presenting it, so THANK YOU SUPERMAN! The signage is everywhere at 7-Eleven, and totally top notch. They're even hocking specially sized bags of guacamole "Kryptonite" Doritos, so for Superman fans who happen to be stoners, 7-Eleven is like, Heaven and Babylon and that stupid Star Trek Nexus place all rolled into one big tempting taquito.

There's a whole bunch of specialness in the cups, too. You can choose from "normal" picture cups that come with neat Superman lids, or for Slurpee drinkers of the more ultimate persuasion, a gigantic plastic THING shaped like Superman's logo that can be filled, drank, washed and kept for just 2.49.

I thought I was squirting myself a cup full of Kryptonite Ice, but turns out the machine had been mislabeled -- I was actually pouring myself a cup full of Arctic Burst, which would've pissed me off more if they actually had the other kind. No dice there, so I can't comment. As for Arctic Burst, it's really good. Picture a cross between a blue raspberry Slush Puppie and the mutant purple sludge that rests at the bottom of every ice cream truck's snowcone. Good stuff. If you're part of the 7-Eleven Slurpee subculture, and I swear it exists, don't wait until the movie's old news to try these. They're never as good by then."

I hate Adam Sandler movies

And don't give me that Happy Gilmore crap. From Darkhorizons, 'Out doing promotions for his new comedy "Click", Adam Sandler revealed to Coming Soon that he is currently shooting the drama "Empty City" about a man who has lost his family in the September 11th attack and he runs into his old college roommate, played by Don Cheadle, who helps him deal with his grief.

He says "Don't know how to describe the movie, how to sum it up... I can't wait for Mike Binder, the man who wrote it, and hear him discuss it, because I don't know how to phrase this. But it's just about a man who's been through a terrible thing -- he lost his family in 9/11 -- and he has a hard time just living life and just being in the moment"

Sandler adds that the character "doesn't want to know about life. He tries to pretend he never had a family. He can only deal with life by thinking about stuff from his past and growing up and he bumps into... Cheadle plays, we went to dental school together, and my character hasn't spoken to anybody in five years and Cheadle makes him feel comfortable. So it's about friendship, I guess. I'm sorry. I just don't know how to say... It's a really interesting script and Mike Binder did a great job with the script and I saw some of it recently and it's a heavy-duty movie"'

Royal Battle just doesn't sound as cool

It looks like one of the better Japanese films in recent years is scheduled to be neutered. From Aintitcoolnews, "Here's a project that could either be utterly fantastic or a steaming pile of shit. I know some of the folks involved in this film. Allegedly it's going to be an extremely Hard R - serious-minded Americanization of BATTLE ROYALE. Personally... in an ideal world... they'd hire Ed Neumeier and Michael Miner to adapt the script and Paul Verhoeven to direct. And they'd just turn them totally loose. Either that... or hire Larry Clark loose on this material and just set the world aflame. The scary part of this project is the tragically hip producer, Neal Moritz is producing... And that pretty much means any chance of this being an extremely hard-nosed brutal american telling of this Japanese classic... well is just about as sure as pissing a straight line outside during a hurricane. Not very likely. Let's hope for the best. At this point, there's no screenwriters and no director. It's just been reported that Neal Moritz and Roy Lee are producing at NEW LINE CINEMAS a remake of BATTLE ROYALE. Let us pray for the best!"

BOLL SUES!

From The horror channel, "BloodRayne was Uwe Boll's biggest budgeted movie to date. It was arguably his most competently made video game movie adaptation to date. It was also his biggest financial flop. How big of a box office bomb was Uwe Boll’s BloodRayne? Enough that he’s willing to sue over it.

Boll’s $25 million adaptation of the scantily clad vampiric video game vixen only grossed a paltry $3,591,980 in theaters worldwide according to Box Office Mojo. Even with DVD sales, that’s quite a financial chasm to overcome. Dr. Boll squarely blames the film’s failure on fledgling movie distribution company Romar, including one of the company’s founders, Billy Zane, who was also one of the co-stars of the movie.

The Hollywood Reporter is reporting today that Boll is suing Romar Entertainment over the matter. Here are the specifics:

"The producers of BloodRayne sued their U.S. distributor Monday for allegedly failing to properly promote or distribute the action horror film. The case brought by Uwe Boll and his companies against Romar Entertainment, James Schramm and Billy Zane seeks unspecified damages in Los Angeles Superior Court for breach of contract and other claims. The suit accuses Romar of breaching the agreement by failing to ensure that the movie opened in at least 2,000 theaters, of failing to pay the plaintiffs their share of the gross proceeds and failing to use the $10 million advanced by the production company to promote and advertise the film."

I’m no lawyer so I’m not really the person to comment on such legal matters, but reports of Romar botching BloodRayne’s opening weekend were widely reported in the week following the film’s release. Whether those mistakes constitute a lawsuit is something for the courts to decide. One thing is certain; Boll will most likely be in need of another distribution company to release his epic Dungeon Siege flick later this year."

Others respond to Zombie

From Iwatchstuff, "If something inside you desired another Halloween movie, allow yourself a brief moment of excitement. It was announced that Rob Zombie, director of House of 1000 Corpses and The Devil's Rejects, will write and direct a new version of the classic:

I think the story and the situation is scary. All it needed was someone to come in and to take a totally different approach to make it scary again. To me, that's the challenge and that's the fun. Everything that has come before does not figure into this one. That series is done.
Since Mr. Zombie is looking to reinvent the series, I thought I'd offer up some ideas I always had for it.

1. Set it on a different holiday. Halloween is too cliched for scary movies. Scariness is more surprising if you don't expect it. Like on Christmas.
2. Call it a different name, maybe named after the new holiday. Like Christmas: The Movie.
3. Give villain Michael Myers a new look. A white beard, for instance. How about a weight problem?
4. Involve the exchange of gifts.
5. Caroling."

Possible Snakes on a Plane Sequels

From Iwatchstuff, "A fella working at a film company, whose job is to search the MPAA's title registry for conflicts, has found some titles that seem to imply the possibility of a Snakes on a Plane sequel. Here's the list:

Snakes on a Boat
Snakes on a Train
Snakes on a Plane 2
More Snakes on a Plane
Snakes in Space

I don't know why they'd even consider Snakes on a Train. If anything, that's a step backwards from having snakes on a plane. If you have snakes on a train, you just stop the train, get off, clear out the snakes, get back on the train. "Snakes on a train" is an equivalent threat to "bee in your car." Clearly your winner here is Snakes in Space. When an astronaut mistakes a snake for his urine tube, you'll see why."

News only a nerd cares about

Good news everybody,

From Superherohype, "Superman Returns Final Running Time
Source: Warner Bros. Pictures June 6, 2006

Superhero Hype! has learned that the final running time for Warner Bros. Pictures' Superman Returns is 2 hours and 33 minutes with credits included. That's 153 minutes.

Superman Returns, directed by Bryan Singer, hits conventional theaters, IMAX and IMAX 3D on June 28th, with screenings starting the night before on the 27th.

It is rated PG-13 for some intense action violence."

The dumbing down of cinema continues

By Claudia Puig, USA TODAY
The devil has a new spawn, but this one is not nearly as creepy as its progenitor.
The new Omen (* * out of four) includes a tedious Power Point presentation detailing the coming of the Anti-christ, shown by a cadre of priests to the pope. Who knew the Apocalypse could be so dull?

Yes, it may be 6/6/06, but was there a reason beyond that to remake the 30-year-old horror classic?

The new Damien (Seamus Davey-Fitzpatrick), the diminutive son of Satan, is simply not scary. His predecessor (Harvey Stephens) was far more unsettling. Julia Stiles, who plays Damien's mother this time, lacks the sophistication and grace of Lee Remick. And few actors working today have Gregory Peck's distinguished gravitas. Liev Schreiber is a fine actor, but playing Damien's father is not his finest moment.

With the exception of revisions to accommodate Schreiber's age (he starts as an ambassadorial assistant, then gets promoted), a shot of the World Trade Center being attacked and the aforementioned papal seminar, the new Omen is almost a scene-by-scene re-creation of the original. (Perhaps that's because David Seltzer wrote both scripts.) Yet it lacks a critical component: the almost stately, suspenseful pacing and subtly eerie sensibility of the original.

The Omen 2006 is a much more obvious horror movie, its scare tactics more overt and gory. But these changes don't make for a more frightening movie.

When the infant son of American diplomat Robert Thorn (Schreiber) dies at birth, Thorn, worried about how his wife (Stiles) will take the news, hastily adopts a baby boy whose mother has just died. The adoption is orchestrated clandestinely through a priest in Rome, the wife kept unaware of the circumstances.

Though not exactly meant as a cautionary tale, The Omen does illustrate why background checks are important: You never know if the infant you impulsively agree to raise might be the spawn of Satan.

The family moves into a gorgeous estate in London, where ghastly events transpire. A nanny hangs herself at Damien's birthday party. Wild animals at the zoo grow frenzied at the sight of the demon seed. Mia Farrow of Rosemary's Baby fame shows up as the nanny from hell, in a nod to that creepier 1968 classic.

Things go from macabre to malevolent, but for the uninitiated, we won't indulge in spoilers. However, for those who have seen the initial Omen, it's easy to become distracted comparing dialogue and noting the rare occasional deviations. Those preoccupations take you out of the movie. And rapt involvement is critical for a horror film to get under your skin.

In the first Omen, the chilling story took some time to unfold, the unsettling nature of the story gradually building. This year's version seems to have a slight case of attention-deficit disorder, or at least impulsiveness: jumping in and almost rushing through the telling. (In theaters nationwide Tuesday. Running time: 1 hour, 45 minutes. Rating: R for disturbing violent content, graphic images and some language.)

hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia

By Jennifer Brooks, Gannett News Service
WASHINGTON — There's a name for it — hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia — fear of the numbers 666.
If you look hard enough, you start seeing 666s everywhere. In bar codes at the supermarket — mark of the beast? In product logos. Encoded in the names of the famous and the infamous. And, of course, on the calendar.

June 6, 2006. Sixth day of the sixth month of the sixth year of this century. Spooky, no?

The Bible itself has done the math, and six-six-six adds up to evil. That's the number, according to the Book of Revelation, by which the Beast, the Anti-christ, will be known.

This could be one devil of a day. Or not.

"There's nothing to get upset about," said Baptist preacher Tim LaHaye, author of the Left Behind series based on the prophesies of Revelation. The final book in the series, The Rapture, is being released, naturally, on June 6. "Everyone knows that the rapture event will not take place on 06/06/06 because Jesus prophesied that no one knows the day or the hour of His return."

Still, when the Bible puts a numerical value on evil, people are going to get squeamish.

On June 5, 2003, New Mexico renumbered its share of the 190-mile-long U.S. Highway 666 — sometimes called "The Devil's Highway" — into the less ominous Highway 491, with Colorado and Utah following suit. The old designation was scaring away tourists, state officials said.

If the world doesn't end today — and since it didn't end on June 6, 1906 or in the year 666, we're probably safe — there will be plenty of other things to do. There's a rare Tuesday opening for the remake of The Omen, a 1976 horror film.

Afterward, you could cruise through a maternity ward and check newborns for the mark of the beast. Or do the math on famous names to see if they add up to 666 — as Bill Gates III does, if you do the calculations in ASCII computer text.

The Church of Satan will be holding a high mass at the Steve Allen Theater in Los Angeles, just to mess with people's heads.

"We are not afraid of 666, nor do we hold it in any particular regard," notes a press release on the church's website. "Historically, 666 is the name of Emperor Nero reduced to its numerological value ... Satanists think this is quaint."

What's really happening, said Joe Barnhart, professor of philosophy and religion studies at the University of North Texas, is that people are searching for patterns and meaning in a world where both may seem in short supply.

"People are just trying to make sense of their cosmos," Barnhart said.

Wicker Man trailer

We haven't had any news on this potentially disasterous remake for a while. Moviesonline reports, "Apple just posted the trailer for the upcoming "The Wicker Man". Nicolas Cage stars in the movie which story follows a sheriff investigating the disappearance of a young girl on a remote island off the coast of Maine. His hopes of unraveling the girl's disappearance become increasingly uncertain when he discovers evidence of pagan rituals. Director Neil LaBute's "The Wicker Man" comes to cinemas September 1st and is a remake of Robin Hardy's 1973 thriller. LaBute directs the movie for which he also has written the adaptation for. To watch the trailer in various Quick Time formats just click right here.

My Spidy sense is tingling, this promotion stinks

From Aintitcoolnews, "Looks like we can look forward to some Spider-Man toys and promotions with our Whoppers next summer.

In the tradition of reporting any slightest tidbit of news related to our most anticipated movies, I submit to you some news on Spidey 3 Cross-Promotions. I belong to one of those survey sites, and was asked to give some opinions on concepts for a promotion at Burger King. It definitely ties in with Spider-Man 3. The examples shown were for a scratch-off game. One concept called it "Use Your Extreme Spidey Sense" while the other (which I preferred) said "Which Spidey Suits You?" and had a split shot of the red costume vs the black one. I've included some pics of the proposed game pieces, but I must apologize for the quality - the pics could not be copied or saved, so I had to just try snapping digital pictures of the screen

So anyway, looks like Burger King is the place to be for Spidey fans next year."