The Strangers

(2008)***1/2

Kristen and James are returning from a wedding reception and staying in James’ family’s remote summer home. We learn through some flashback snippets that James had proposed to Kristen but she turned him down. Rejecting James’ proposal cast a predictable negative tone to the evening and we feel the uncomfortable tension between the two as they attempt to get through the rest of the night together. This tension is soon interrupted by a sharp knock on the door. Opening the door the dour duo find a young girl who asks, “Is Tamara home?” When told that she has the wrong house she walks away but stands in the yard and lingers for a moment.



James leaves soon after to buy some supplies from a five and dime. Now alone in the house Kristin is startled when there is another knock on the door and we hear the same girl ask, “Is Tamara home?” After telling her that she has already been to the house Kristin suddenly finds herself barraged by loud knocking from all over the house. Adding to the tension is a blaring fire alarm set off from the fireplace. When Kristin attempts to call James with her cell phone she finds that her battery is low. Putting it down to charge for a moment she returns to find it gone. While freaking out, Kristin catches a glimpse of a man wearing a creepy mask. Soon James returns and although initially skeptical of her story he soon learns that she is telling the truth as a trio of mask-wearing sociopaths victimizes the two during a long night of terror.



The Strangers is scary, like Halloween (1978) scary. First time director Bryan Bertino, manages to achieve the vibe and feel of Carpenter’s legendary scare-fest, something that countless slashers have failed to do over the past three decades. After watching numerous films that have attempted and mostly failed to emulate Halloween, it struck me how truly impressive Carpenter’s small yet terrifying story continues to be. Why Halloween worked has been the subject of endless analysis. Having watched it again recently for probably the 30th time I think it boils down to a few characteristics other directors typically overlook. Carpenter keeps his story simple, he uses interesting camera angles, he makes innocuous settings appear eerie and claustrophobic, and he uses (created) a minimal, repetitive synth score.



It could be argued that The Strangers rips off Halloween, but I don’t believe that would be a fair statement. Director Bertino just gets it. He doesn’t rip off Halloween, he just understands why Halloween continues to be effective. In his film the “Strangers” don’t just appear, they emerge in the background while the protagonists are doing other things. The top still is a great example. This is the first moment that we see that stranger wearing that freaky sack. Kristen doesn’t see him and won’t for a while. The other two “Strangers” emerge similarly in other scenes. The screen composition is Cracker Jack! Like Halloween The Strangers has a grainy, unclean feel to it rather than the slick polished look of today’s horror films. Additionally, rather then pound us with rock or any popular music at the moment (which would make the film outdated 6 months later), director Bertino wisely chooses long stretches of silence punctuated by loud door knocking and wall banging. The situation is scary.



Okay, so why not a higher rating? A few reasons, actually. First, the characters just aren’t very likable. We never really get to know them beyond a few flashbacks showcasing the breakup moment of their relationship, and quite frankly, I thought Kristen was a jerk for turning down James’ proposal. She never offered a convincing reason why beyond, “I’m not ready”. Another problem is that it’s made clear early on that the “Strangers” are real people yet they move in and out of scenes with impossible stealth. You can’t walk across a large wooden floor without making at least one creak! Also, there are a number of cheap scares of the hand on the shoulder variety (e.g., “I didn’t mean to scare you” - well don’t walk up to her and put your hand on her shoulder while you’re dealing with three sociopaths!). Finally, and this is a biggie, I just didn’t like one specific aspect of the ending, which would spoil the film if I clarified. Suffice it to say I didn’t derive any satisfaction from the climax (infuriated is more like it) and felt cheated after such a perfect first act. Still, one might argue that these complaints are minor compared to the overall gestalt of the story. While these specific aspects of the film detracted from my overall rating, The Strangers is a creepy story that is very much worth your time.

Meg Ryan proves once again that gravity exists

Where the Wild Things Are looks promising

Hasn't this been in production for, like, ever?

Old Vampire-Killing Kit Sells For Small Fortune

From geekology, An authentic vampire-killing kit from the 1800's recently sold at auction for nearly $15,000 to a pale man in a black cape. "This is a complete kit that comes fully equipped - stakes, mirrors, a gun with silver bullets (because where there are Vampires there might be Werewolves), crosses, a Bible, holy water, candles and garlic." The whole kit is housed in a beautifully decorated American walnut carrying-case. You know, because vampires hate nut trees, and nuts in general. Isn't that right, Dracula? Haha, biggest pair you've ever seen!

Dead & Breakfast

(2004) ***½


A group of six friends are driving to a wedding in Galveston, TX. They get a little off course and after a long day of driving they decide to spend the night in a tiny town called Lovelock. The only available lodgings are at a bed and breakfast run by the eccentric Mr. Wise. Upon arrival, Mr. Wises’ French chef Henri rudely greets them. Once inside, they meet Mr. Wise (David Caradine) he seems nice enough and provides them with rooms for the night.

One of the girls, Kelly, observes Mr. Wise as he performs a ritual over a small box. He tells her that the box is meant to give good luck. The next day, after being locked out of the house Johnny, one of the friends decides to climb in an open second floor window. He accidentally knocks over the peculiar box breaking the seal that encircled it. Johnny opens it and unleashes an evil spirit that possesses him.

He begins his rampage taking a piece of people he kills and placing it into the box, which in turn transforms them into his obedient zombies. He goes after his travelling mates with his army of redneck zombies in tow. The only person who seems to have a clue how to stop the madness is a mysterious drifter who has come to town intending to destroy the box.


This movie was a lot of fun. Not quite as appealing as Shaun of the Dead, but fun none the less. The beginning is a bit slow. You know this is going to be a bit different for Horror when they pull into a gas station after entering Lovelock and are greeted in song by the station attendant and his band. Not like a musical type of singing, but singing ala Something About Mary but with a country twang to it.

Aaaaah, line dancing zombies. Now I really am scared!

The band shows up periodically throughout the film singing songs about what is going on. But that isn’t the real entertainment here, it’s the splatterfest that comes midway through the film and takes us right to the end.

Memorable deaths are by pruning shears, cymbal, claw hammer, drumstick and homemade shotgun. This is a fun film, one that combines horror and comedy and pulls it off quite well.

Oh Fock! Stiller to make another uncomfortable sequel

It's not secret that I hate the Meet the Parents films. I find the Three's Company-like misunderstandings to be torturous and uncomfortable. It's the same reason I hate shows like Camera Camera or Punk'd. I just don't dig laughing at someone else's anguish (e.g., "We're just kidding, your husband isn't really dead!"). Ha ha.

From slashfilm, Fox News is reporting that Ben Stiller is back to developing a third film in the Meet The Parents series called Little Fockers.

“In the natural progression of things, Robert DeNiro and Blythe Danner would return as grandparents to Ben Stiller and Teri Polo’s babies. Of course, Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand would have to return as well.”


Meet the Parents was actually a pretty funny family comedy, but I found Fockers extremely painful to watch. The title is the funniest thing about the sequel. The addition of Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand just didn’t work, and I don’t think the introduction of a baby (or possible twins) will make a third film any better.

Ever wonder what happened to the girl from Goonies?

From cinemablend, Ever sit around and wonder whatever happened to some of the child actors from your favorite movies as a kid? Like where’s the kid from Swiss Family Robinson and the Shaggy Dog movies now? Or the kid with glasses from The Mighty Ducks? Or Opie from Andy Griffith… oh yeah. Or what about the girl from The Goonies? What you say? There was a girl in the Goonies? I thought that was Corey Feldman! Well it was Corey Feldman, but there was also a girl.

In the film her name was Andy, but in real life her name is Kerri Green. After Goonies she did some movies, including work with John Candy and Charlie Sheen, which no one probably now remembers before falling into the black hole of after school specials. Now she’s back, and she’s got a starring role.

She’s got the lead in a movie called Complacent , a film which writer Steven R. Monroe says he actually wrote specifically for her. I guess he had a little crush going after Goonies too. The film is a drama about two sisters whose lives are rocked by tragedy. It’s being compared to American Beauty, which I guess could mean a poster featuring naked Kerri covered in roses… but probably not. It is however a safe bet that Kerri plays one of the sisters; unless she plays the tragedy, which would be sort of metaphysical and experimental, but perhaps too edgy for general audiences.

Complacency is shooting now, and in addition to Kerri, Cerina Vincent (Cabin Fever), Adrienne Barbeau (Escape from New York), Christopher Showerman (George of the Jungle 2), Elisa Donovan (Clueless), Joey Kern (Super Troopers), and Keir O’Donnell (Wedding Crashers) star.

The Spirit continues to look awful

From iwatch stuff, No one seems too convinced by the last few trailers for The Spirit, so Lionsgate has pushed out one more quickie to remind everyone that the film comes out CHRISTMAS DAY. If your gifts aren't enough of a let down for the family, pack the kids in the Aerostar and take them to The Spirit, show them the true meaning of Christmas (disappointment). I particularly like the rockin' version of "Carol of the Bells" in this. It makes me feel like I'm watching a ridiculous, noir-based Home Alone sequel.

See trailer here

The Last Supper

(1995) ***½


Jude, Pete, Paulie, Marc, and Luke are five liberal graduate students who share a house together. Out in the middle of nowhere Pete gets stuck, and Zach a truck driver, gives him a lift home. As his housemates are about to have dinner, Pete asks Zach to join them to show his thanks. The mood turns sour when during a dinner discussion they pose the question, “ If you met Adolph Hitler when he was just a struggling cartoonist, wouldn't you have done the world a big favor by murdering him?” The housemates decide they would kill him but Zach doesn't share their point of view. When he proclaims Hitler had the right idea, the argument gets heated, rapidly advancing to a fight. Suddenly Zach whips out a knife, the housemates struggle to get the knife from him and during the struggle Zach is accidentally killed. They decide to bury his body in the backyard vegetable garden. Afterward they have a lengthy discussion about the evening’s events. They come to the conclusion that the world would be better off without a terrible hateful person like Zach. Furthermore, they would be doing the world a great justice if they killed more ignorant people just like him. They make a decision to have a weekly dinner party and each of them would take turns bringing a guest. If the group considers the guest okay they get to live. But, if the guest gets the thumbs down then a special mixture of poisoned wine is served to them and they wind up keeping Zach company in the veggie patch. All is well and good until the local sheriff starts poking around in the tomato plants.

This is a nice example of how a good idea in theory, sometimes doesn’t work out so well when it’s executed. As the bodies pile up the tension between the housemates escalates. Some are a little too eager for the kill while others are starting to question the whole process. When the sheriff begins questioning them about a missing child they become unnerved. They start arguing amongst themselves and begin to doubt each other’s trustworthiness. As the stress level rises they begin to get a little sloppy, everyone is nervous and edgy and things begin to fall apart. I loved the choices of dinner guests including a priest, a skin head & an annoying teenage abortion activist. The discussions that precede the inevitable murders are classic. The cast works well, I especially loved Courtney B. Vance. He was just so into the killing, he was hysterical. I liked this film the first time I saw it somewhere in the late 90’s and have to say that it has retained it’s magic for me some 10 years later. Very entertaining and intellectually witty.

Unreleased Beatles track

From ew, So it really does exist. The 14-minute "Carnival of Light" track, long the stuff of Beatles legend, will finally see the light of day, according to Paul McCartney, who says he's always been fond of the experimental noodling "because it's the Beatles free, going off piste." The track is said to feature distorted electric guitars, discordant sound effects, a church organ, and gargling sounds, as well as McCartney and John Lennon screaming phrases like "Barcelona" and "Are you all right?"
McCartney's says the Beatles didn't release the track when they recorded it in 1967 because its avant-garde experimentation, described as inspired by musique concrète composer Karlheinz Stockhausen, was too adventurous for mainstream audiences at the time. It certainly sounds adventerous enough, but I have to wonder if the real reason is that it's simply not that good, another failed attempt at translating a sublime acid trip to art. For one, the Beatles included "Revolution No. 9," another long experimental track inspired by Stockhausen, on the White Album just one year later, in 1968. And the Velvet Underground's White Light White Heat was pretty out-there back in 1968. Then Lou Reed took his former band's craziness a step further with 1975's Metal Machine Music, which was so experimental people at the time thought it had to be a joke. Seems to me we were "ready" for Beatles' experimentation long before now, and seeing as we've heard just about everything they've pressed to vinyl over the past 40-plus years, I worry that we'll be disappointed with the release of the mythological "Carnival of Light." Of course, all that blather aside, I can't wait to hear the damn thing. You?

Man Beast

(1956)**1/2

Connie Hayward’s brother is missing. He was last seen in the Himalayas, where he was searching for the legendary Yeti. Forming a search team that includes friends and an anthropologist, Connie sets out to search her brother’s last known whereabouts, a remote base camp high in the mountains. During her search she meets Vargas, her brother’s creepy guide who aids the group on their journey. Before long team members begin disappearing and Connie has a strange feeling that they are all being watched, but by whom?



Despite questionable acting, low rent production values (with plenty of stock footage to boot) and too much early exposition, Man Beast is actually a lot of fun and a cut above some of the other popular “monster” movies of its time. Although not always successful, the film attempts to address some ambitious “science” fiction concepts, such as evolution, ESP, and crossbreeding, and it examines the nature of obsessive behavior – the pursuit of the Yeti at all cost. Even more interesting is the implied notion of bestiality/rape between Connie and the “Man Beast”, which is pretty weighty stuff for 1956 pulp sci-fi. I find that I really dig horror movies that take place in the snow.