Once again it's time to loosen up those typing fingers and start writing some haikus. It's my job to try and inspire you.Having little time to prepare a topic I searched through some saved pictures in my Horrorthon folder for inspiration. The answer was obvious, villains. Those beloved characters we all love to hate.
From the popular standbys like Freddy, Jason and Michael Myers
To the obscure and unforgettable
Often the subject of nightmares
or the source of laughter
crazy religious freaks
and number one fans
crappy parents
and children with issues
don't forget our comic book favorites
and those who made us say uncle
real life monsters
and monsters in the media
So without further ado I turn these vilainous fellas over to your creative hands. Now get typing!
27 comments:
Mel can't seem to learn
to keep his big fat mouth shut
he flushed his career
Don't feel bad for him
anti semitic douchebag
only self to blame
When my kids were small
I'd ask who's the worst bad guy
We'd argue for hours
Their choice limited
To Disney films at their age
I think Jafar won
But not for me though
Ursula and Snow White's queen
both evil bitches
Twirling my moustache
Tying the girl to the tracks
What's the point, really?
The hero rescues
Or the girl is train batter
Sort of a lose-lose
If held by Jame Gumb
I'd never use the lotion
Come down and make me
who's more villainous
in aliens? the monsters,
or creep carter burke?
buffy villains rocked
principal, master, glory
loveably evil
My work enemy
Adam "The Fat Fuck" Fischer
He's a Yankees fan
mojo jojo, yo!
the powerpuffs' nemesis
and jon's avatar
When he passes by
I roll my eyes in disgust
I truly hate him
Just went to go pee
He was stinking up the place
I left, still must pee
Hey Freddy Krueger
Kill me if you feel you must
But spare me your puns
Jason’s in a rut
He’s dead and then he’s not dead
Make up your damn mind
Ultimate villain
Ritchie from Out For Justice
I hate him so much!
The face of evil
A retard with a chainsaw
Can’t be reasoned with
The lamest villain
The Head of the Family
Can’t help but love him
My Showcase villain
Trace Croce, she hated me
I hope she's in pain
Oops, that should be Tracy (bitch)
Wile E. Coyote
He's not much of a hunter
he'd have starved to death
What of Gargamel?
Sits in shack, ponders defeat
Worst wizard ever
Nothin' but villians
A whole wretched hive of 'em
Mos Eisley is cool
Sauron's just an eye
Stop looking at me, villain
Throw some dust at you
Worst job in the world
Legion of Doom janitor
Villians are messy
Yes they are messy
and I bet they don't pay well
no union wages
Must investigate
The Haikuers have vanished
I smell villainy
Star Blazers villain
Desslok rules the Gamilons
Fight wretched Star Force
(that was an intro to MrsX offering up this missive regarding action figures in our apartment:)
Desslok and Barack
Holding hands atop my box
It's not what you think
(By way of explanation, I have a 12" Desslok figure and a 5" Obama figure arranged holding hands atop our cable box)
Swiper, don't swipe me!
That pesky fox wants my stuff.
Stupid little dick.
Cylons do it right.
"I'll fuck you, then I'll kill you."
They're like my heroes.
Not the most evil
But by far the most stylish
Cruella DeVille
Black white punk rock hair
Dark red Rolls Royce pimpmobile
And she wears puppies
Oh Malificent
Your dark evil runs so deep
You've got freaking horns
Check this witch bitches
Know what beats apples, tridents?
Damn dragon, that's what
It's our guarantee
Here at Dark Side of the Force
Power, and bad skin
I'm sorry I didn't participate - I was on Narragansett Beach all day - at least I got a bitching tan out of it!
That's the sloppiest haiku I've ever read.
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