Wednesday, December 26, 2012

The Hobbit

(2012) ***1/2

There were definitely times Jackson captured the magic of the story, some of the effects were spectacular, and the cast is fantastic, but I did find The Hobbit slow and "padded out" in the beginning, and the whole movie was less rigorously faithful to the book than the LOTR movies were.  Mr. AC liked it better than I did; our friend who had seen the LOTR movies but hadn't read any Tolkien was fairly unimpressed and found it "silly" at times.  We saw it in regular ol' 2D; maybe the 3D version is more impressive?  Who else has seen it, and what did you think?

Sunday, December 23, 2012

Snow Rhino is a big hit



50PageMcGee stopped by with a present for Zack last night. "I don't know, has Zack moved past stuffed animals?" he said on the phone. The answer is a resounding NO; Zack is way into his stuffed animals these days. So while Zack slept, the rhino got wrapped, and was opened this morning to big smiles. "What is he?" Zack asked me, the stylized Michelin Man form being a little confusing. "He's a rhino," I replied, "see the horn?"

"He's a SNOW rhino!" Zack said. And thus Snow Rhino joined the fam.

Merry Christmas Eve Eve, folks! Can you believe those pesky Mayans tried to ruin Christmas?

Thanks Marc!

Friday, December 21, 2012

Happy Apocalypse Day!



Well folks, that's it. Been nice knowing you all. If today's end of all things is getting you down, do what I do: hold up a comically small parasol in the face of the giant meteor shower. I saw a coyote do it once and he bounced right back.

Cheers!

Thursday, December 20, 2012

The perfect stocking stuffer

While we're all out searching for last-minute gifts (or for some of you, biding your time until Christmas Eve hoping to discover the perfect present for the special people in your life), consider sharing a heavy metal Christmas with none other than the prolific, well-respected, and 90-year old Christopher Lee.



Here he is discussing the quality of symphonic metal. You've just got to love how he keeps it real and relevant with this kinda stuff.


Wednesday, December 19, 2012

The Great Pumpkin

Here's a Peanuts parody that I think works better... a lot of the same jokes, too.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Octopunk sees Wolverine! Sort of...



If you click this image for bigness, you will see that the red rectangle in the center has a podium on it, and there's a guy standing at the podium. Prepare to be thrilled, because that tiny man is none other than the actual Hugh Jackman, accepting his new star on Hollywood Boulevard. Isn't he dreamy?

Backstory, you ask? I was in an office on the 11th floor of the building across the street, my Lego freakery nabbing me a last-minute job for an ad firm with a peachy location. The event above is in front of Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum, and while there's about 15 of those in the world, right next door is a more unique location:



That's Grauman's Chinese Theater, which you may have heard of (that patchwork of cement in the forecourt is made up of famous footprints). This block is like the Times Square of Hollywood (the Oscars are held a few doors down), and the street noise is constant. I would've had no idea what all the screaming was about if I hadn't been parked in the empty office with the best view; the regular employees kept popping in for a look and they told me the deal. One of them had spotted Scarlett Johansson when they were downstairs, and I got to hear this hilarious exchange:
Guy employee: "I am so over all of this stuff."
Girl employee: "No you're not, that's bullshit."
Guy employee: (pause) "Yeah, you're right."

That pretty much sums it up. When you live here, celebrity doings are largely inconveniences; I didn't go downstairs for a look because I didn't want to deal with gaining re-entry to the high security building. But dang if I didn't take a lousy picture just to show how I rub elbows* with the stahs.

(*Margin of elbow-rubbing error: a couple of hundred feet.)

Geek bliss! "Pacific Rim" trailer shows giant monsters fighting giant robots!

Friday, December 14, 2012

'A Good Day to Die Hard' poster: Meet the McClanes


From ew, Fresh off that great poster with the tagline that hopefully earned somebody from the marketing department a well-deserved promotion, the new poster for February’s A Good Day to Die Hard opts for a tagline-free look at the McClane boys — papa John and son Jack — holding identical really big guns and staring off-camera. Maybe they’re staring at a helicopter they’re going to shoot at. Maybe, given the movie’s Moscow setting, they are staring at President Vladimir Putin, and Putin is saying something like “Do you really sink you heff a chawnce against us, cowboys?” (Putin has a German accent, for some reason

Review: 'Hobbit' a sluggish misadventure with a TV sheen


(CNN) -- They say the longest journey starts with a single step.



But with "The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey," the first in a trilogy adapted from J.R.R. Tolkien's first novel, Peter Jackson has taken a different approach: He's gone two steps forward and three steps back.


In the process he's undoubtedly made himself a whole lot richer. "The Hobbit" is dominating screen space across the globe this weekend, and will certainly be among the biggest moneymakers of the year. But he's also jeopardized the legacy of his own "Lord of the Rings."


Fans won't want to hear it, but "An Unexpected Journey" is a major comedown, a muddle-headed and cumbersome piece of filmmaking that betrays Jackson's mercenary motives -- Tolkien's book, too. "The Hobbit" is far lighter work than what followed, and at approximately 350 pages, hardly crying out for the 10-hour magnum opus treatment (but three films are so much more profitable than one!)


Stars reveal Tolkien power wish list In just shy of three hours, "An Unexpected Journey" takes the story up to chapter seven -- about 140 pages in my paperback edition.


Jackson has shown his elephantine tendencies before, in the bloated and indulgent extended editions of the "Rings" films. But in the earlier trilogy -- which I admired and enjoyed, incidentally -- he clearly showed he had the measure of the material and understood both Tolkien's moral convictions and the books' darker forebodings of impending death and destruction.


Even if it's something of a dry run for Frodo's odyssey, "The Hobbit" is a different beast. There's so much less at stake in the story of Bilbo Baggins (Martin Freeman) joining Gandalf (Ian McKellen) and a band of dwarves in a raid on a dragon's mountainous lair.


This is an adventure story, a caper with elves and goblins. And yet Jackson gives it the same portentous, heroic swagger; the same doomy menaces. It's just that this time the action is spooned out in thimbles. The rest of the running time is given over to dwarfish humor, endless, unfunny comic bluster and banter interspersed with duff warrior dirges and desperate close-ups of Freeman mugging.


"Sluggish" doesn't begin to do justice to the way Jackson has padded out his narrative. But there's worse, far worse, for anyone tempted to check out the movie in its 3-D, 48 frames per second incarnation (showcased in approximately 450 premium screens across North America). The theory behind this cutting edge technology -- which doubles the 24 fps that has been standard in movies since the silent era -- is that the faster frame rate allows more luminescence, counterbalancing the loss incurred in 3-D. It's clearer, brighter and more immersive -- in theory. In practice, it's clearer, brighter, and utterly alienating.


I haven't seen the movie screened at 24 fps, but at 48, the grain of film has been replaced by the gloss of high definition video, which gives everything and everyone a fake, plastic sheen.


"An Unexpected Journey" may look sharp in TV showrooms or on your PS3, but in the movie theater the picture's clarity comes at the loss of texture, shading and consistency. Shifts from exteriors to dark interiors are especially jarring. Look also at the dull, flat orange taint that is meant to approximate candle light in numerous scenes, and compare that with the glow you find in "Barry Lyndon," or "Fanny and Alexander," or your own birthday snaps.


Did Jackson embrace 48 fps to keep himself interested, because he knew he was retreading old ground? Is he really blind to the limitations of this technology at this stage of its evolution? I won't say it has no future, but for now this emperor has no clothes. It's a colossal misjudgment. He's put his name to the ugliest film of the year, a $270 million three-hour epic that looks like a TV show ("Teletubbies" was the first to pop into my head, and "Doctor Who" was the most flattering comparison I could come up with.)


In fairness, there are redeeming features: The movie does sputter into life in the last 45 minutes, especially during a lengthy battle of wits between Bilbo and Gollum. And Ian McKellen miraculously, alone among the cast, transcends the picture's artificial surface and imposes himself on such drama as he can find.


In my book that's not enough return for three hours at the movies, or whatever inflated price they're charging for your ticket now.

Salem's Lot 1979 and Salem's Lot 2024

Happy Halloween everybody! Julie's working late and the boy doesn't have school tomorrow so he's heading to one of those crazy f...