Monday, January 31, 2011

Creepiest toy ever

Suddenly Anne Hathaway playing Catwoman doesn't seem like such a good idea

James Bond and ‘Midnight Cowboy’ Composer John Barry Has Died at Age 77

From slashfilm, One of the great film composers has passed. It was revealed last night that BAFTA and Oscar-winning composer John Barry died Saturday of a sudden heart attack in New York. He was 77. Mr. Barry contributed a great many memorable cinema scores, including those of many James Bond movies as well as for films as diverse as Midnight Cowboy, The Black Hole and Dances With Wolves. For many his Bond work is his greatest legacy, but I still regard the plaintive harmonica theme for Midnight Cowboy as one of the most effective movie themes I’ve ever heard.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Burger King Commercial Banned in New Zealand

50P and his dad?

Perfect: Javier Bardem Offered Starring Role in New James Bond Film

From slashfilm [excerpt] Javier Bardem has been pretty unstoppable this week. In the past 7 days alone, Bardem has received an Academy Award nomination for Best Actor and been offered a lead role in Ron Howard’s Dark Tower adaptation. On top of all that, we’ve now learned that Bardem has been offered a starring role in the 23rd James Bond film. Hit the jump to find out what we know.

The news comes from Deadline, who reports that the offer to appear in the next Bond was extended last week, around the same time as the Dark Tower offer was. Nikki Finke and Mike Fleming at Deadline speculate on what this role might be, saying, “Details about the character are being kept under wraps for now. But traditionally the biggest male role opposite 007 is the villain…”

Robin Williams To Play Dr. Hugo Strange In Dark Knight Rises?

From cinemablend, Well, this is certainly out of left field. If you were expecting the Dark Knight Rises rumors to end now that we’ve finally started getting a real cast, you apparently don’t know how the internet works. This evening the web has been aflutter with rumors that Robin Williams will play Dr. Hugo Strange. It all seems to stem from a tweet by Batman On Film, but as Caped Crusader sources go, they’re among the most trustworthy.

You may remember ages ago, Williams came within a hair of landing the coveted Joker role in Tim Burton’s Batman, but it was not to be. Still, after all those years, the longing hasn’t quite died. The comedian who’s arguably better in his dramatic roles openly said last year that he’d work on The Dark Knight Rises in a second, but up until now, his words seemed more like longing than real casting news.

I’m not completely sold. Thus far, there’s been no confirmation from Williams, the studio or Christopher Nolan; so, even as much as I trust Batman On Film, I must recommend you take this purely as a rumor for the time being. What a glorious rumor it is though. For those of you unfamiliar with Gotham, Dr. Hugo Strange is a Batman-obsessed villain psychologist with more than a few screws loose. Williams has not only won an Academy Award for playing a shrink but has also crushed all of his creepy psychopath roles in the past.

Culture Club to reunite

From ew, After recent hinting in the press, Boy George confirms: Culture Club will reunite next year.

The singer, 49, also promises a "proper huge worldwide tour" starring the iconic '80s hitmakers. The announcement comes during the run-up to the release of his solo album 'Ordinary Alien,' partly written while he served four months in prison for the assault and false imprisonment of a male escort.

Responding to a question about a Culture Club reunion, sent to the BBC's 'Breakfast' show late last week by celebrity fan Mark Ronson (a top producer in the industry, and brother of Lindsay Lohan's ex, Samantha Ronson), Boy George replied: "We are getting back together. Next year. This year [I'm touring] on my own. It's kind of a precursor for what I'm doing with Culture Club in 2012. We'll be doing a proper huge worldwide tour. And a new album."

The reunion falls on the band's 30th anniversary. They nearly hit the road together in 2006, when original bandmates Mikey Craig and Jon Moss announced a Culture Club comeback, but their flamboyant frontman declined to sign on, and plans were soon scrapped.

"I kind of use my writing like a diary, so I write about things that are very personal to me, things that I've experienced, things that have affected me and that I feel strongly about," Boy George (born George Alan O'Dowd) has said about growing as an artist during his 2009 imprisonment. "I've surprised myself, really with my resilience. Yes [prison] did happen, but it feels so long ago now."

Meet the next Superman

From ew, Henry Cavill, 27, best known for playing Charles Brandon on Showtime’s The Tudors, has been cast as Clark Kent/Superman in the new Superman movie to be directed by Zack Snyder, Warner Bros. announced today. “In the pantheon of superheroes, Superman is the most recognized and revered character of all time, and I am honored to be a part of his return to the big screen,” Snyder says in the release. “I also join Warner Bros., Legendary and the producers in saying how excited we are about the casting of Henry. He is the perfect choice to don the cape and S shield.” The film is expected to hit theaters in December 2012. David S. Goyer is writing the script, based on a story by Goyer and Christopher Nolan, director of The Dark Knight and Inception, who is among the movie’s producers.

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Oh my god there's two of them!

Since flash pics take all the jazz out of jack-o'-lanterns, Johnny Sweatpants kindly photoshopped a dark shot onto the flash shot. Thanks Johnny!

(The real 50P is on the right.)

Friday, January 28, 2011

Say it isn't so, Jon!

FORT LAUDERDALE — An actor who starred as one of two California highway officers in the 1970s TV series CHiPs was sentenced Friday to serve three years probation for conspiring to commit securities fraud.

U.S. District Judge James I. Cohn imposed the sentence on Larry Wilcox, 63, who had faced a maximum prison term of five years. Wilcox also must perform 500 hours of community service and pay a fine of $100.
"I think we got an individual who is truly remorseful," Cohn said. "He should not be punished because of his celebrity status."
Wilcox played Officer Jonathan "Jon" Baker on the show, opposite Erik Estrada as Officer Frank 'Ponch' Poncherello. Wilcox left the show a year before it ended its NBC run from 1977-83.
He wiped away tears as he addressed the court before sentencing.

Read more here

Just in time for Horrorthon 2011

It's Showtime!

The Marc-o'-Lantern

For 50P's birthday I gave him a three-month old pumpkin with his face on it.

What, you've never procrastinated on anything?

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Happy Birthday, 50Page McGee!

Five seconds after this was taken that thing crawled up his lapel and tried to eat his face

Yes that's right, beloved west-coaster and musical genius 50P McG is turning 33 today.

Same age as Jesus when he got nailed to some wood! So bust out your finest tequila and your finest nails and wish the guy some lerve. Bang bang bang!

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Balloon Party!

As I've said, I'm not a huge fan of poetry, basically because it scares me to death, so I've decided to change the format for this week. I of course welcome poetry back next week or whatever the winner chooses to do.

So without further delay, this week's topic is balloons, and I want you to write a series of vignettes that individually tell a story that together forms a larger one, with each including this topic in some way. I think it might be best to share my writing example and then I'll lay out the rules, which are vast, and maybe complicated if I explain them like an ass, but are meant to allow for an array of creativity.

When I was a kid my mother worked for a singing balloonagram company. She would often drag my sister and me with her to work. Her goal was to go back to the shop as little as possible, and so she would cram more balloons in the car than there was breathing space. Painfully, we would sit huddled within a rainbow cave of rubber, our bodies contorted and powerless to move. Usually we were starving, but my mother’s obsessive tardiness resulted in her standard response of, ​“We don’t have the time. Stop being babies you’re not going to die.” We succumbed to the torture, and tried not to pay attention to the unremitting gurgling sounds blaring from our bellies, and the nauseating smell of latex being shoved up our noses.

At my best friend’s eleventh birthday party there was a talentless, obnoxious clown named Mr. Giggles. With whisky soaked breath and nicotine stained teeth, he told dim-witted jokes, like why did the chicken cross the road. Even though his humor was lame, his balloon animals had been the buzz of conversation. Everyone kept congregating tightly around as Mr. Giggles, with intense concentration that made his forehead crinkle and eyes water, had successfully constructed beauties, such as a three legged dog with a missing ear, a short neck giraffe with a tumor protruding from its belly, and balloon hats that closely resembled the male genitalia. We all laughed at first, but it soon got old, and after numerous attempts to keep our attention, Mr. Giggles desperately resorted to mooning us.My sister once dated a guy named Lan Tran who always wore a red and black checkered shirt, and fixed car transmissions with his unblemished, oversized hands. One blistering summer day Lan drove up to our house with a helium tank. I watched as his beefy arms jolted and perspired while he wrestled the hefty piece of metal out from the bed of his truck and into our garage. Later, I helped Lan blow up balloons while my sister borrowed his truck to pick up friends. When he wasn’t paying attention I stole glances at his handsome feathered, streaked mullet. ​He soon asked me if I wanted to do it, and handed me a helium filled balloon. As I sucked the air through my throat and into my lungs, I imagined the cold air trickling inside me and being warmed by my body was Lan’s sweet syrupy breath. I began to get dizzy and lightheaded, and in an instant I was flat on my back watching my balloon whiz by my head as the remainder of helium forced itself out. Like a velocious bull, Lan charged to my side to examine my condition. I blurted that I was fine with a voice that sounded like one of the chipmunks, while with impeccable timing, as always, my sister came sauntering in with her friends and rudely told me to leave. Everyone laughed, including Lan. Still feeling the effects of the helium, I sat outside the garage with the discomforting sensation of my exile in the pit of my belly, and listened while the happy gang repetitively gulped down helium, and made crank calls to elderly people.

“Bombs away,” they screamed. We had averted our eyes upward just in time to see orbs of red, yellow, green and blue spiraling down upon us. The three of us screamed from the intense feeling of latex snapping against our skin, like rubber bands, and the shock of the cold unforgiving water dripping down our legs.

​“You dumb jerks,” I yelled up at them.

​“Screw you Stevens,” howled my friend Meredith while she politely gave him the finger.

Jill, who was always the quiet one, kept walking, until, out of the blue, she came to a dust screeching halt, and with the poise of a dancer lifted her insipid freckled arm to examine the cherry colored welt that was increasingly jutting out. Instantaneously, her pale skinned face turned fire engine red, while her stretched, lean fingers, which normally hung droopily by her side, began ceasing a strength that caused her emerald veins to slither and stretch beneath her pasty casing. With the speed of the roadrunner, Jill suddenly sprinted up two steps at a time to their apartment and gracefully threw Stevens out of the window.

The funeral was cheerless. In an ironic attempt to memorialize Stevens, someone at the burial released several hand signed balloons. Little boys jumped wildly in the air in an effort to keep them captive, but as the spheres were sucked further into the cosmic sky, loosing their importance to the eyes, the boys began to cry.

Adam, my college boyfriend, who I met at Stevens' funeral, took me on a surprise picnic in a secluded spot with rolling hills as far as the eyes could see. We ate cheese, strawberries, and more wine than either of us should have drank. Adam eagerly fondled my upper thigh, and soon we were naked, his body pressed confidently into mine. while our bodies entwined, a breeze of colors swooshed passed my face. It was...

Now, on to the rules:

1) Each vignette must include balloons in some form. This means, for example, it can be actual balloons; a balloon design on a shirt, tablecloth, window, etc.; maybe something that looks like balloons; or simply conversations about balloons.

2) Each vignette needs to tell a story, while together forming a larger one.

3) You cannot write an ending to each series of vignettes. You want them to stay open. Why? See rule 4.

4) You can choose to continue writing my last vignette, which I left unfinished, and then continue that series; or you can write an entirely new series of vignettes; or you can write off of someone else's series. You don't have to pick up where the last person left off. For example, say JPX decided to finish my last one and continue the story for a few more vignettes. Cat could then either pickup where JPX left off or she could choose to write where I left off and send the story in a completely different direction.

5) Your stories have to include balloons, but other than that they can incorporate anything you want and be wherever you want. They can be about people, animals, objects, locations, senses, etc. They can take place over the course of an hour, a day, or a lifetime.

6) Write as little or as much as you want.

7) If I've confused the hell out of you, and you don't know what to do, then just write anything that you want. Rules were meant to be broken, and no matter what, if I love it, I'll award you the winner.

All right, enough rules, now go have some fun with balloons.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

A Mighty River: "How YOU can help" (me)

Working with my friend Arthur Roses, I made this one-minute viral ad for a Chicago-based diversity-initiative website called Apparently Raham Emmanuel has already seen it and it was going to be shown to Obama's staff in the White House today (although I'm not sure if that's actually happening).

Anyway all you Horrorthonners can do me a solid by going to the link, watching the video, and then forwarding the link to lots of friends and family and asking that they watch it too. Our client is watching the YouTube statistics and it would be much better for Arthur and myself if it got a lot of traffic (given the disputes we had with the client concerning effective "messaging" etc.). Thanks!

Kevin Smith announces retirement

From cinemablend, In the past year, things have been fairly tumultuous for Kevin Smith. The writer/director, who has one of the more active celebrity Twitter accounts, has been very vocal about his dislike of film criticism and via his Podcasts, has hinted that his next project, the hockey film Hit Somebody, will be his last movie. Now he's made it official.

Speaking after the premiere of his newest film, Red State (read our review here), at the Sundance Film Festival tonight, Smith has confirmed that he will retire as a director following the filming of his next project. According to our source on the inside, the wonderful Katey Rich, he will instead focus on helping other people make movies. Whether this means that he will be serving as a producer or continuing to write is unknown, but we will update this story as we know more.

Though Smith has more than his fair share of critics, I have always enjoyed his films. Even today Clerks is the perfect example of what determination and perseverance can lead to. Dogma is a tremendously well written film about the nature of faith. And hell, Jay and Silent Bob are wonderful characters that earned their popularity. It's a shame it has to end this way, but here's hoping it's actually for the best.

7 things you really don’t need to take a photo of !

#4 Concerts

See full list here

Monday, January 24, 2011

Fitness guru Jack LaLanne dies at 96

Answer = Red Sky at Night

Question = What is the name of the next Bond film?

Avatar sequels coming XMAS 2014 and 2015

From ew, James Cameron has spoken frequently about his intention to turn his mega-hit Avatar into a trilogy. Now, according to the director himself, those two sequels have release dates. Cameron tells EW, “I am in the process of writing the next two Avatar films now. We are planning to shoot them together and post them together, and we will probably release them not quite back to back, but about a year apart. Christmas ’14 and ’15 is the current plan.” Of course, it’s probably best to take those release dates with a grain of salt, since the first Avatar had several release dates before its December 2009 release. Still, now fans know that they’ll have to wait at least three more years for a return to Pandora.

Cameron also notes that we’ll see some familiar faces return. “Basically, if you survived the first film, you get to be in the second film, at least in some form,” say the director. One thing’s for sure: some percentage of the presumably-massive Avatar sequel gross will go to charity. “Fox has partnered with me to donate a chunk of the profits to environmental causes that are at the heart of the Avatar world,” says the director. “I didn’t want to make more Avatar movies without a grander plan in place.”

And the nominee's for this year's Razzies are...

Go here for the complete list!

Neo's back! Keanu Reeves Says "Matrix 4" and "5" are Coming

From worstpreviews, AICN received a scoop from an event that took place at the London International School of Performing Arts, where Keanu Reeves spoke to the class about his career while promoting his new movie "Henry's Crime."

He spoke briefly about "47 Ronin" and "Bill and Ted 3," but the big news came when Reeves revealed that he met with the Wachowskis around Christmas. They told him that they completed script treatments for two more "Matrix" installments. They are planning to make the films in 3D and have already met with James Cameron to discuss the advantages and disadvantages of the technology.

Reeves added that he's excited to return as Neo and promised that the treatments will truly revolutionize the action genre like the first "Matrix" film did.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Seven Days


The young daughter of a surgeon is abducted, raped and murdered. The chief detective on the case informs the couple that they have caught the perpetrator and have a positive dna match. Feeling the prison system would not deal a fitting punishment, the surgeon abducts the murderer applying his own means of personal torture.

It's so easy to say, “I'd kill the bastard!” or “I'd torture that guy!” This film makes you really think about how extremely difficult it would be to actually carry out that punishment. To go against your own morals throwing all restraint to the wind and torture another human being. A very intense film that deals with raw human emotion. You see both sides of this emotional dilemma since the wife is in disagreement with her husband's actions. I can honestly say that I cannot recall ever watching a French Canadian film before unless I just mistook it for a regular French film. Anyway, they got this one right. I truly felt for this couple and the whole situation was disturbingly ugly. Oh and the FX in this film are sick.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Orange Tuesday..uh..Wednesday Results

Though the day got off to a slow start (even with the extra day to ponder the topic) we still finished with a pretty impressive collection of prose. In the end we learned a lot about our fears.

Thanks to Octo who did a great job poetically rounding up the troops.
We found out 50P fears his property will soon be a sunken treasure.

JPX was tortured by a turtle.

while AC's killer kitty terrorized her.

Some fears we were already aware of, like Stan's fear of the dreaded green pants.

Johnny warned us about the back streets of Oakland.

While Mr. AC warned of flesh eating albino rats.

But I had to give the win to Whirly Girl for sharing another tale from her perplexing youth. I have no idea what "buzzer pants" are but I tell you I laughed myself to tears when I read this:

My sister wore "buzzer pants"
because she often wet our bed
She didn't fear anything
but that buzzer filled me with dread

I would hear it go off
yet she slept through it with glee
Meanwhile I knew that in seconds
I would be touched by her pee

Congratulations Whirly Girl, next Wednesday is in your hands.

Kelly Preston reminds us that Scientologists are crazy people

Kevin Smith Says Bruce Willis Was a Nightmare to Work With

From worstpreviews, Around the time "Cop Out" was being released, Kevin Smith revealed that it was difficult working with Bruce Willis, who wouldn't take direction and was constantly proposing his own ideas on how to direct the film.

After the shoot wrapped, everyone gathered for a party. Everyone, except for Willis. During the party, Smith was quoted as saying: "I want to thank everyone who worked on the film, except for Bruce Willis, who is a f*cking d*ck."

Smith has now revealed that Willis "wouldn't even sit for a f*cking poster shoot." He went on to say that the experience "was f*ckin soul crushing. A lot of people are gonna be like, 'Oh, you're just trying to blame the movie on him.' No, but I had no f*cking help from this dude whatsoever."

Included [above] is an interview Smith did with Opie and Anthony where he talks about working with Willis and how simple scenes were ruined by the actor. He starts at the 2:30 mark.

Super Bowl movie trailers

I make no secret about how much I loathe football. Truthfully I've never seen a game from beginning to end and I still have no idea what the rules are or how the scoring works. "First and ten", what the hell does that mean? Throwing a Hail Mary pass? Fantasy Football? You might as well speak to me in Klingon while attaching my testicles to a car battery. I used to tape the Super Bowl so I could skip the game and watch the commercials.

He's single, ladies

I no longer care about any of it but the Super Bowl is a great opportunity to catch new movie trailers. Thankfully in the era of the internet I can just catch them online after the game (and post them on this wonderful blog). I don't mean to be a killjoy and I understand that I'm in the extreme minority here. Anyway, here's a list of all the movie traiers you can expect to see during the big game. When the hell is the Super Bowl anyway? I love it when football season ends.

Super 8
Transformers: Dark of the Moon
Captain America: The First Avenger
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Cowboys & Aliens
Just Go With It
Battle: Los Angeles
The Eagle
Kung Fu Panda 2
Take Me Home Tonight

Anne Hathaway is Catwoman, Tom Hardy is Bane in The Dark Knight Rises

From avclub, The time for rumors and speculation is, alas, at an end: Anne Hathaway will play Catwoman and Tom Hardy will play Bane in Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight Rises. Of course, the press release never mentions the “cat” word, saying only that Hathaway will play “Selina Kyle,” suggesting that the film could be focused primarily on her origin story, or that it’s trying to preserve the surprise of Selina’s transformation into Catwoman from those select few people who would be interested in seeing a Batman film yet have somehow avoided finding out that they are one and the same. In which case, spoiler alert, we guess. As for Hardy’s role, Bane is well known in Bat-lore as the venom-addicted super-soldier who snapped Batman’s spine in the “Knightfall” saga, setting off one of the grimmest story arcs in the comic’s history. But seeing as there’s no indication of any sudden incorporations of Robin, let alone any brainwashed grad students named Jean-Paul, something tells us Nolan isn’t going there this time. (Although that would be a pretty cruel way to end his trilogy.)

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Nominated for an Edgar!

We just found out that 7 Souls, the supernatural teen thriller I wrote with my genius friend Barnabas Miller, has been nominated for a (frigging) Edgar Award!

What are the Edgars? Glad you asked: "Each Spring, Mystery Writers of America present the Edgar® Awards, widely acknowledged to be the most prestigious awards in the genre. This year marks the 65th anniversary of the Gala Banquet." (More info.)

I can't believe it! Nominated for an award, and attending a (frigging) Awards Banquet! I think I need some lithium or tequila or something! Wow!

Orange You Scared?

Well it's Wednesday and I've had a week to think long and hard about a topic for Orange Wednesday's poetry slam. I've mulled over the past HHD topics and pondered on a few new ones as well. What keeps jumping forward in my mind is fear. We're Horrorthon, nothing scares us, right? Well I'm hoping to call some of you out. What are your deepest darkest fears? What scared you as a child? What scares you now?


Abandoned Houses?



Cats? Catfreeeks?





Perhaps it's Death himself that raises the hairs on the back of your neck. What do say my fearless Horrorthonners, are you ready to turn your fears into poetry or are you too scared?