Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Secret Oranges

Aunt May's first ever panel and she's hideously stooped with age!


I was writing a comment on Jordan's post below and it was going so long I deciced to make a new post and park Jordan's underneath it. Because while reading Spidey's origins I suddenly recalled a key element in my dislike of origin stories, and here it is:

I never read any of this crap!

Let me explain:

First, I don't actually think it's crap; I just couldn't resist the obnoxious poetry of that statement.

Second, I got into comics in 1985, when the "oh my gosh comics can be sophisticated" trend was only a few years in. My comics mentor Sherm leant me back issues of Alan Moore's run on Swamp Thing, Chris Claremont's run on X-Men (both of which were still going at that point), Frank Miller's run on Daredevil, and Steve Englehart's run on Detective Comics (in which the Joker was first transformed from a goofy clown to the homicidal maniac we love today). This was after I cut my teeth on Howard Chaykin's American Flagg, which has faded into obscurity but was totally awesome. So I was right there for Watchmen and The Dark Knight Returns in 1986 and everything that followed.

But prior to that? Everything from the mainstream that had decades of backstory going back to the 60's or 30's? To me at age 16, that was the goofy crap that I had no desire to read.

When I was a kid it was all about dinosaurs and monster movies and Star Wars and Thunderbirds and Space: 1999. My experience with comics was a couple fat books we got from the library (about Superman, Batman and the DC Captain Marvel), and three comic books bought for me for various airplane flights: an issue of The Defenders, an issue of House of Mystery, and another one that was Marvel and cosmic-y, maybe Captain Marvel.

Aside from reading Jon Byrne's run on Fantastic Four I've never really gone back to read anything else regarded as classics, especially in the Marvel Universe. It's possible I've actually never read the Spider-Man origin that Jordan just posted (I know I've read his story, but the art seems unfamiliar to me, so I probably read a recap). The bulk of the work done by Stan Lee, Neal Adams, Jack Kirby, Walt Simonson (to name a few) is stuff I've never seen.

I've got no love for the Planet of the Apes franchise for the same reason: no experience of it in a certain key age window. I respect the magic that Jordan's talking about and I understand that everything I do like about comics is built on it -- and most importantly I do enjoy reading it, but I can't divest myself from a level of detachment from the material. I can't give it a pass because of its age.

Anyway, that's my own self-indulgent perspective. It's an amusing reversal of the way my tastes and Jordan's typically fall. Usually it's Jordan who prefers his action/sci-fi/etc have an armature of sophistication (e.g. Alien), while I often champion the sillier stuff (e.g. Sucker Punch, not that I'm inviting a fight between those two movies). This probably explains why we fall on different sides in our opinion of the debut years of Image Comics.

As for Spidey's original origin story, which I recommend everyone read, I will admit there's more sophistication there than I tend to give it credit for. There's even better justification for my least favorite part of the story, the part where the thief who Peter allows to escape is the same guy who kills Uncle Ben.

Like any respectable nerd who lands on top, Peter was turning into a dick after being on TV. I don't think I ever knew that pre-crimefighter Spidey had TV and newspaper coverage. I mean, yes, it's ridiculous that he would "play to a packed house" and "win a showbiz award" and never once take off his mask, make any money, or sign anything that would make him accountable when he quit, but whatever. He has to go from dick to hero and all the better if he's really turning into a dick, right?

But... ack. I still can't get around the Same Mugger business. It's a plot point worthy of an ABC After School Special.

The Amazing Spider-Man


So here's the thing. There are differences of opinion about origin stories; about silver age comic books; about certain comic book artists and movie directors; about cynical franchise trends. These differences of opinion occasionally surface here on Horrorthon. But I submit to you: Amazing Fantasy # 15, August 1962, 12 cents. The Amazing Spider-Man. It's only twelve pages long. And Steve Ditko can't draw; he is to a picture what Lou Reed is to a song. But it's pure magic and the immediate reactions it got (in measurable sales terms) showed that Marvel was on to something. The Amazing Spider-Man, a story in twelve pages that I think you could hang on a gallery wall:

http://www.jordanorlando.com/amazingfantasy15

‘Star Wars’ Blu-ray Controversy: Has George Lucas Made Two Terrible Audio Alterations to the Original Trilogy?


From slashfilm, There is more possible ‘Star Wars alteration’ controversy today. The word going around on TheForce.net and other message boards is that review copies of the Star Wars blu-ray set have trickled out, and two of the supposed changes to the original trilogy are being highlighted. While the digital Yoda in The Phantom Menace is a much broader change, these two alterations — if true — will be far more irritating.

The two big tweaks reported are changes to audio, one in the original Star Wars and the other in Return of the Jedi. The latter is the big one, as two instances of Darth Vader saying and screaming ‘Nooo!’ have reportedly been added to the scene where (spoiler!) Vader throws the Emperor to his doom. The idea would seemingly be to establish some thin and wholly silly symmetry between the versions of Vader at the end of each Star Wars trilogy. Check out the two audio changes below. Prepare to cringe. Again: the veracity of these clips remains in doubt. There is a troll at work here; we just don’t know yet if it is George Lucas, or some anonymous prankster.

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Better Than Looking at Jar Jar All Day

Unintentionally sexual church signs, see the rest here.

Even the Jar Jar action figure annoys me


(via yakface)

Will the next James Bond Movie be called Carte Blanche?


From denofgeek, It’s a story that’s worth treating with a healthy bit of caution, but it’s an interesting story, nevertheless. Bleeding Cool have picked up a report originally posed on a Serbian website, Blic Online, which suggests that the 23rd Bond movie may be based on the novel Carte Blanche by Jeffery Deaver.

The source for this story is a Serbian cellist, Jelena Mihailovic, who’s reportedly been hired to write the score for the next 007 movie, following an impressive performance at the Cannes film festival. While the news story on Blic focuses on the news that Mihailovic will join the likes of Paul McCartney and Madonna in the a 007 musician hall of fame, it only makes a casual mention of Carte Blanche.

As Bleeding Cool point out, it’s possible that Mihailovic may have blurted out the name of the movie by mistake, having momentarily forgotten that it hasn’t been formally announced yet. And given that Carte Blanche is the title of the latest Bond novel officially commissioned by Fleming’s rights holders, it makes sense, we suppose, that it be the basis of the movie – and its contemporary setting would fit well with the tone of the previous Bond films.

Until we get an official confirmation, though, we’ll have to approach this one as an interesting rumour. More Bond 23 news as we get it.

The Skin I Live In


(via slashfilm)Ever since his wife was burned in a car crash, Dr. Robert Ledgard, an eminent plastic surgeon, has been interested in creating a new skin with which he could have saved her. After twelve years, he manages to cultivate a skin that is a real shield against every assault. In addition to years of study and experimentation, Robert needed three more things: no scruples, an accomplice and a human guinea pig. Scruples were never a problem. Marilia, the woman who looked after him from the day he was born, is his most faithful accomplice. And as for the human guinea pig…

Monday, August 29, 2011

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Cat's Trapped!


Stay safe my little beetle. I parked her across the street because of my neighbors rotten old tree.

My power is up but phone line is down. No way out!

Can't go this way either. Thanks Irene, you big bitch!

Bye bye swimming pool, found this walking the neighborhood.
A crowd of beer drinking wanderers came strolling through the neighborhood. Sadly, I was unable to get a picture of the guy with the mullet. He moved too quickly for me.

However I did catch the drunken idiot making moose calls through a traffic cone.

Carnival Of Souls

(1962) **** Carnival Of Souls  is in the absolute tip-toppest tier of late-night horror flicks. If all you want to do is watch something til...