Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Daily Spider-Bomb! The week after that other week!

Don't fret, Spidey!  Everyone knows Spider-Sense doesn't work on "brick doors."

"But first, carry me back to my limo!  I like being carried now."

On just his third super-heroing foray, Doc Ock rakes in more cash than decades of accumulated Bugle photos.  Fortunately Peter is used to the mask concealing his tears.

There's been a rush of new characters these past few weeks, but neither Water Buffalo nor Percy McMoneypots can compare to my new favorite character PRESSton Flat-Top.  I like to imagine his coworkers told him he had to wear that checked jacket and armband back when he was an intern, and somehow the prank has lasted eighteen years.

I also like to imagine he blew a lucrative career in surveillance photos because he kept loudly summarizing events from his hiding place.  "Judge Murphy purchasing sex from some hookers!?!  His estranged wife is gonna love these pics!"

I totally believe him.  Especially if his plans revolve around double chins and nostrils.  Yeesh.

Soooo, you've got that camera that magically takes a bazillion pictures of Spider-Man all by itself and today you... what?  Forgot to take off the lenscap?

FOR FUCK'S SAKE PETER GET A REAL JOB.  AREN'T YOU A SCIENTIST OR SOMETHING?  

Sorry, got a little fed up there.  I was going to say that Peter's "good money" comment was one of the rare times he zings Jameson in an argument, and I think it's appropriate that immediately after he stands up to his crazy boss he gets shot down by the sane one.

1 comment:

JPX said...

I have concluded that Peter is as loser on every level. His boss doesn't respect him, he gets nothing for being Spider-Man, and he hasn't figured out a way to make any money. I would charge J.J. up the ass for any pictures of Spider-Man and I would tell him that if he doesn't like it, tough shit. Peter has all the leverage but he acts like a child in the face of J.J. I would just let Doc Ock do his thing and say, "fuck you" to everyone.