Friday, March 30, 2012

Terrifying New 2.5" Wasp Has Jaws Longer Than Legs


From geekology, RETROACTIVE WARNING: Scary wasp picture above.

This is a new species of giant wasp discovered in Indonesia, effectively canceling my plans to ever visit the country. It grows over 2.5" long and has jaws longer than its legs. That...ain't right. Same goes for longer-than-leg genitals.

Lynn Kimsey, professor of entomology at the University of California, Davis, says 'Its jaws are so large that they wrap up either side of the head when closed. When the jaws are open they are actually longer than the male's front legs.'

'I'm going to name it Garuda, after the national symbol of Indonesia,' Kimsey said.

Garuda - known as 'King of Birds' - is a powerful mythical warrior that's part human and part eagle, boasts a large wingspan, martial prowess and breakneck speed.

'The large jaws probably play a role in defense and reproduction,' she said.


OMG -- my jaws play a roll in reproduction too! Get it? "Like licking nipples?" Well that too but I was gonna say like eating nachos off each other's bodies. "Con queso?" OF COURSE CON QUESO.

9 comments:

Catfreeek said...

Wow, it's like it mated with a hercules beetle. That thing looks downright medieval.

Jordan said...

The "Reese Witherspoon" of wasps!

Jordan said...

Actually I think Reese Witherspoon is the "Reese Witherspoon" of WASPs.

JPX said...

HAHA

Octopunk said...

Clever bastards.

I think the eyes are even scarier than the jaws.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

I wonder who would win in a fight between one of these wasps and a camel spider?

Jordan said...

I would win, with my shoe.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

This freak better not come to the Great White North. Screw the jungle man. To many things there that are just made to mess with me in a bad way.

Cal's Canadian Cave of Coolness said...

This freak better not come to the Great White North. Screw the jungle man. To many things there that are just made to mess with me in a bad way.