Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Lamest board game ever; 'Mom, I wanted Colecovision, not this!'

From retrogames, When I wrote about video arcade game boards a few days ago, I was reminded of another kind of "arcade board"... "board game", really. When video arcade games took off in the early 80's, traditional game manufacturers tried to cash in with non-electronic companions to some of the most popular games.

Zaxxon was one of the first video games with a 3D type perspective (actual 3D games were still some years away), a leap in video game realism. This game's many pieces do sort of capture the spirit of the pseudo-3D original on a physical 2D playfield.

Like many tie-in type board games, there are no huge thrills here. But if you're a huge video game fan, and your grandma doesn't have a Colecovision, then maybe a game like this can help you get through Thanksgiving weekend.

6 comments:

Octopunk said...

Wow. I don't think I can imagine a scene of more misery than a kid playing that game at Grandma's house. You know, the younger kids would be okay with it, but the one kid who played actual Colecovision Zaxxon would just be sporting a permanent pout all day.

Still, better than the Stampede board game.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

I disagree.

Octopunk said...

This is your argumentative mood? Slinging about contentious statements in regard to made-up board games based on Activision cartridges?

Well fine. As you can see by the hex-grid on the Zaxxon board, that game allowed for flexible movement around the board. Stampede, on the other hand, only went in one direction, necessitating the bogus "lasso card" situation that wound up screwing the people who picked their horse lane last.

Most of the game was decided on the roll of who got to go first, because as the game play plodded from left to right, you couldn't move your horse up or down out of your chosen lane. If were one of the unlucky ones whose plastic game piece (which was just a cheap knight piece from the company's chess game, molded in one of four different colors), you had to pray that the lasso cards you got were long enough to reach those faraway steers.

And of course the cowboy game pieces were the good part, remember those steers? Tiddly winks with the word "Moo" stamped on them. Unbelievable.

The die was the worst by far, because in keeping with the Southwestern theme some smartyboots decided it would be cool to mold it out of baked clay. Can you all say "adobe" with me? The one we had was blessed with two sides that had four dots, (no six), and it crumbled into dust before we'd played four games.

Worst Thanksgiving ever.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

I begrudgingly concede this debate to you because a) I had never heard of the Stampede boardgame and b) you made a damn good case...

"Slinging about contentious statements in regard to made-up board games based on Activision cartridges" was precisely the mood!

Octopunk said...

And I, for one, enjoyed the mood! It took me a while to fully respond.

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