Tuesday, May 03, 2011

10 Disturbing Questions Raised by the Original Star Tours


From toplessrobot, Last year, the ride Star Tours in Disneyland and Walt Disney World shut down in preparation for a much-needed revamp. It was a bittersweet moment for geeks everywhere who had flocked to its hallowed halls in a chance to live some of the Star Wars magic. On one hand, the ride was nearly 25 years old and felt it. On the other, we knew we'd have to suffer through pod race footage.

Here's the brief plot, if you haven't been on the ride. You're part of a tour group going to Endor. Your pilot droid, Rex (voiced by Paul Reubens), is new, so when you zip out of hyperspace you end up in a battle between a star destroyer and some X-wings. After zipping through the trenches of the Death Star, a la A New Hope, you fly away and back to the home star port. Just watch the video so you know what I'm talking about:


10) Who the Hell Wants to Take a Tour to Endor?
I know why Endor was chosen to be the Star Tours destination: it's one of the few places that's mentioned by name in the original trilogy (keep in mind, of course, that this ride opened in 1987, which means plans for the ride were probably in place right after Return of the Jedi came out -- and four years before Timothy Zahn's Heir to the Empire was published). But who the fuck would want to vacation on Endor? It's portrayed in Jedi as a backwoods waste of a planet with little in the ways of settlement. It's so off the radar that the natives speak a language that even the hyper-fluent C-3PO doesn't immediately recognize. The Empire decided to build the Death Star there because no one cares about Endor and no one visits. So why would a tour company make that a prime vacation destination?

See the rest of the list here

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