Marmaduke
Gasoline Alley
Beetle Bailey
For Better For Worse
Brenda Starr
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Malevolent
2018 ***1/2 It's 1986 for some reason, and a team of paranormal investigators are making a big name for themselves all over Scotland. ...
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I’m sure none of you except for JPX knows that I’m a bit of a germ-a-phobic. It’s annoying, but manageable. Though, since I met JPX and list...
16 comments:
Marmaduke
"Santa accidentally took something called viagra instead of aspirin. He said if Marmaduke is still sitting on him after 4 hours we should call his doctor."
Brenda Starr
Panel 1
(silence)
Panel 2
(thinking) "What's that awful smell? Did that babe just fart?"
Panel 3
(thinking) "I think I'm a little turned on"
Marmaduke
"I would appear that Marmaduke finally found his 'bone'"
Beetle Baily
Panel 1
"The men are really charged up about the new rape and pillage training program."
"I don't know Sir, the whole thing seems rather barbaric to me."
Panel 2
"Listen up gentlemen! Today you are going to learn how to run a train on miss Daisy! Remember to ignore any pleads for mercy."
Brenda Star
Panel 1
…
Panel 2
“This jacket is the best purchase I ever made.”
Panel 3
“I can slap my willie around all day long and no one suspects a thing.”
Gasoline Alley
Panel 1
"Shake a leg mister, you know time is money."
Panel 2
"Don't get your panties in a bunch you uppity dame, I'm moving as fast as my battered old body will allow."
Panel 3
"Well you do realize you only paid for the hour."
Brenda Starr
Panel 1
Mmmmmhmmmm...
Panel 2
'Think it's time for a little elevator action.'
Panel 3
'I'm getting up while she's a-goin' down.'
Beetle Bailey
Panel 1
"Why that's the most disgusting thing I've ever heard."
"I know, right? And yet for some reason the entire infantry unit is is in her room."
Panel 2
"I said 'gangrene' not 'gang bang' fellas."
Marmaduke
"That dog shat out a Santa Claus!"
Marmaduke
“Hey Marmaduke, I know you think you're cute and all but the truth is you're fucking annoying and I hate you."
marmaduke
santa: "that steaming mess in my lap better be wassail!"
gasoline alley
1
"this is a little embarrassing..."
2
"i've never had a woman inspect my junk before deciding whether to do me or not."
3
"shut up, and turn around so i can check out your ass."
For Better For Worse
Panel 1
(thinking) Thank the Gods, this shit is finally over. I sure hope John buys my "little miss virgin got pregnant on the wedding night" story What was I thinking marrying a mormon.
"Have a great honeymoon you two, make us some grandbabies!"
Panel 2
"I remember when John was conceived on our wedding night. Oh what a glorious time that was, who knew that I would be so potent. Now I have 15 kids of my own and here I am seeing my eldest son off into the sanctity of marriage. Well, enough of that, soon you'll have your own bun in the oven..."
"But Daaaad, Lisa already has a bun in the oven. I heard her say so"
Panel 3
"You must be mistaken Billy, John and I...well...we couldn't be pregnant."
"Nuh uh, I heard yoooouuu, and you said it wasn't John's either."
Panel 4
"Great Gadsby! You mean that night wasn't a dream? Oh well, at least it stayed all in the family, right son?"
Panel 5
"Yeap, the old man's still got it, Heh heh heh."
Gasoline Alley
Panel 1
“Yes, the VFW meeting went well, thanks for asking. I always like meeting up with those rascals, they’re a fun bunch”
Panel 2
“[grunt] I’m afraid that I overate, as usual. I don’t mean to cut this conversation short but I really need to spend some quality time in the john.”
Panel 3
“May I watch?”
Marmaduke:
Even with the "public dogfucking" rider in his contract, he was still the best department store Santa in town.
For Better or Worse
Panel 1
“I really hope Dad doesn’t embarrass me on the most important day of my life...”
“Hey Elizabeth! Did you remember to go B.M. before the ceremony?”
Panel 2
“If you’re gonna do butt sex for the first time tonight you don’t want to catch Anthony off guard with a packed trunk.”
“Mommy, what does ‘butt sex’ mean?”
Panel 3
“You see little Jimmy, when a mommy and daddy love each other but grow tired of doing the same things over and over then – “
Panel 4
“Holy crap my own daughter is giving me a boner!”
Panel 5
“Just kidding folks, I’ve had this boner since lunch!”
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