Friday, December 01, 2006

Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers

(1995) ***

When I recently presented my overview of the Halloween series I discussed the odd history of Halloween 6: The Curse of Michael Myers.

‘Believe it or not, there exists a completely different cut of Halloween 6, which is far superior to what was released in the theaters. This version has never been officially released, but being an intrepid investigator (nerd) I was able to score a copy at a collectibles show years ago. According to my bootleg box, “After the original completion of Halloween 6, the producer was replaced and over half of the film was reshot, including a new ending. This is the never before seen original version of Halloween 6."’

My original intent was to watch the theatrical cut of this film and compare it to this unreleased version, but alas, the 31 wonderful days that October offers as a gift each year was simply not enough and I ran out of time. I’ve only seen the theatrical version one time and that was in the theater with Octopunk in 1995. Given that I don’t recall what I was wearing yesterday the likelihood of me recalling anything about this film is on par with my ability to move objects with mind. The only thing I remember is that we kept making fun of Loomis, who seemed to be laboring to breathe. Of course I feel a bit badly about this now knowing that he actually died before the film was completed. Anyhoo, rather than attempting to make any sort of comparison, I’m just going to focus on this cut of the film as if it’s the only version that exists.


As you might recall, Halloween 5 concluded bizarrely with Michael being sprung from jail by a mysterious man in black (no, not that man in black). It’s always been puzzling to me that Michael, who would be the most notorious serial killer in the history of mankind, is placed unattended in a rinky-dink jail cell akin to something you would see on the Andy Griffith Show, but that’s besides the point I suppose.

It is unclear how much time has passed since Halloween 5. As the strange story begins, a now pregnant Jamie is being held captive by a group of evil druids (are there any other kind?). These druids, called “Thorn”, apparently protect and control Michael. During the first few minutes of the film Jamie gives birth and her baby is quickly whisked away from her. Later, a sympathetic druid becomes a turncoat, gives Jamie back her baby and aids her in her escape. She dies for this altruism of course. Once free Jamie heads toward Haddonfield hoping for Loomis’ help (why she would believe that Loomis resides in Haddonfield makes no sense). Hiding her newborn in a Haddonfield bus station bathroom, Michael almost succeeds in killing her.


Unfortunately Jamie’s death cheat is short-lived. While being cared for in the hospital, she is assassinated by the man in black (if there’s one lesson that we’ve learned from watching the Halloween films it’s to stay the hell out of the Haddonfield hospital). Meanwhile, in the type of coincidence that only occurs in the movies, a grown up Tommy Doyle (who Laurie Strode babysat in the original Halloween) stumbles upon Jamie’s baby. Coincidentally (again) Loomis happens to be at the hospital just as Tommy walks by with the kid. Loomis resolves to help Tommy protect Jamie’s baby while attempting to stop Michael one last time. Michael, meanwhile, spends his time trying to locate the baby as well as dispatching a new batch of Strodes who now live in the old Myers house. This includes Kara and her young, illegitimate son Danny, who has visions that instruct him to kill. Confused yet?

The druids eventually kidnap Kara and Danny and together Loomis and Tommy set out to infiltrate their strange underground lair to rescue them. Tommy, as it turns out, has figured out a way to stop Michael, which includes using magical runes. In a bizarre twist we learn that Loomis’ buddy Dr. Wynn is not all that he seems.


God this was a pain in the ass to summarize, and I skipped a bunch of stuff. This was more fun to watch than to write about. This film is really weird and it veers wildly from the original Halloween. The writers work hard to explain Michael’s motivation, which is akin to ruining a good magic trick. Quite frankly, I don’t want to know why Michael kills, that’s what makes him the boogeyman. Nevertheless, this version is much better than the cinematic version, which I recall despising. For those who care, here’s some more about the difference between the 2 versions.

“While the theatrical version has more gore, and longer suspense scenes, it cuts large amounts of character and plot development that were present in the producer's cut. The worst examples of these cuts involve Loomis and Doyle. Most of Loomis' scenes are truncated, and we are given little exposition about his relationship with Dr. Wynn. In the producer's cut we are given additional background, and there is a plot point involving Wynn's retirement and his desire to see Loomis replace him as the head of Smith's Grove Sanitarium. Because the film's biggest surprise (in either version) has to do with Wynn, it makes no sense to cut this material. Important info about Tommy Doyle is lost in the theatrical cut as well. In the producer's cut Doyle has figured out the significance of the Thorn rune, and he has a plan to use positive runes against the evil influence it represents. So long as you can keep your suspension of disbelief intact, these elements combine to form a somewhat logical plot."

5 comments:

JPX said...

I apologize in advance for this poorly written review. I've struggled with it for a while and the words just didn't come to me. This was a complicated film (for a horror film) and a difficult one to write about. Also, I'm experiencing severe Horrorthon summary burnout.

50PageMcGee said...

that looks miraculously like paul rudd...

checking imdb...

it's PAUL RUDD!

i can almost hear him saying to loomis, "you taste like a burger. i don't like you anymore."

Octopunk said...

Oh yeah, nice review there; bad enough you quote someone else, but you also boost a big paragraph from yourself, sleeze queen.

Oh relax, I'm kidding. Except for I'mnotMarc, we all got slammed by the post-contest burnout. What's amazing to me is reading the emails from September when we were all giddy with excitement. Nice to know that comes back every year, and that in ten months or so we'll be chomping at the bit again.

Maybe you'll even have your reviews finished by then, ha ha.

JPX said...

Did you put my head on a fat person's body?

JPX said...

For the record I still have about 15 reviews left. Sigh.

Malevolent

 2018  ***1/2 It's 1986 for some reason, and a team of paranormal investigators are making a big name for themselves all over Scotland. ...