1. Favorite: Dawn of the Dead 2004. I saw a lot of really good movies this year, but this one is just such an overwhelming success on so many levels. It also came with two great bonus features: seeing it on the big screen with two of my fellow Horrorthonners, and the extended zombie dialogue sparked by Jordan's headfirst dive into the world of high-class zombification. DotD04 was the nucleus of a ton of fun this year.
2. Hidden gem award: Dog Soldiers was such an unexpected knock out of the park! I admit it wasn't really all that hidden. But while I'd heard it was good, I never grokked how good until I was getting beat about the head with werewolfy goodness. A runner-up for Favorite.
3. Most Disturbing: I sat through so many dinners with those freakin' Texans this year, but ultimately I'm going with Hostel. Those bastards were just so cold in the pursuit of money, and the violence was so damn ugly.
4. Scream Queen: That one's easy. Jessica Biel from the remake of Texas Chainsaw Massacre. She's what Homer Simpson meant when he said "curves that make us crazy."
5. Worst: A number of possibilities here; Chainsaw #3, Cat O' Nine Tails or Leprechaun are all good choices. But the final honor goes to FeardotCom for being so much of everything I hate about bad Hollywood product. Ugh, just useless.
6. So Bad It's Good Award: Night of the Lepus! The monster is rabbits -- real rabbits turned loose on miniature sets. It's unbeatable. Honorable mention to Leeches! and Fear of Clowns.
7. Goriest: Zombies, chainsaw massacres, cannibals and hooker torture -- there's quite a bit to choose from. But I'm giving this one to Hostel, too. The scene where Paxton has to use scissors to help out a fellow captive made me cringe like nothing else.
8. Most memorable death: That one goes to the Chainsaw prequel, for the guy who's eviscerated on the table his girlfriend is hiding beneath, so his bits are flying off the tip of the chainsaw and into her face. That was inspired.
9. Best-looking monster: The Thing. Its true face is the chaos of its transformations, worked through practical effects to achieve Lovecraftian levels of insane horror. Deliciously frightening.
10. Scariest: Ju-on still held on to its spot. The palpable fear in this movie reminds me of the way good vodka pours when it's been in the freezer for a while. The chill is marked by a slight thickness in the smooth liquid; the effect is appealing in a ruthless kind of way. However, I'm ready for Ju-on to be toppled.
3 comments:
1) Night of the Lepus! I missed the review, somehow. My favorite part (because it's pretty much the only part I've seen) involves rapid cross-cutting between the kitchen (a miniature set with rabbits) and the basement (a full-sized set with DeForest Kelley); Kelley is standing around wearing an ascot inside his shirt collar, eyes blazing, while someone else pokes a broom through a hole in the basement ceiling. Cut to the rabbits dealing with a toothpick coming up through the "kitchen" floor. Octo's right: it just could not be beat.
2) I don't think I've ever seen Jessica Biel in a movie. Suddenly my Dad knew who she was (because of The Illusionist) and I was like, how the hell did my Dad find out about an actress who isn't in Merchant/Ivory movies or whatever? She looks great in those photos, though. The entire crew must have been 100% aware of the degree to which setup after setup involved carefully pointing the camera at her body. I imagine she slinks into the frame in that second shot you included, with the director telling her, "now make sure to stop right at this exact spot so your butt is pefectly framed, Jessica."
3) I'm putting this here so you guys will see it: What the hell is all this old-school promotional photography of jpx/summerisle? It's hilarious!
4) I can't do one of these lists but I think there has to be "best zombies getting in" and "worst zombies getting in." (Since, as octo has correctly pointed out, "the zombies always get in." It's like "The Postman Always Rings Twice" -- "The Zombies Always Get In"). Best is Stephen breaking through the fake wall in DOTD'78 and leading them up to the apartment. Worst (sorry guys) is that guy in DAY activiating the elevator. I mean what the fuck was that.
'It's like "The Postman Always Rings Twice" -- "'
Oh God that's funny, Jordan!
Here's the info on that old-school picture (taken from one of our other blogs);
"Picture it, 1982. My father’s psychology intern somehow found the time to obtain videogame trademark licenses and develop this series of swell attire. He asked my family to pose in the flyer, which was to be distributed in handheld electronic videogames such as this keen Pacman game.
That’s me in the Frogger shirt and Donkey Kong hat. My dad’s sporting a Pacman tie that I’d kill for today. My mom’s wearing the Bezerk shirt, a game I always loved but could never really play very well. That’s my brother in the sweet Pacman shirt and hat. My sister’s sporting the lame “Hey hey hey, I love to play” shirt, and the designer of all these wonderful items is sporting a very cool Donkey Kong shirt with bumper stickers. I can’ tell you how much I wish I still had these items.
Now, I want to make one thing very, very clear to anyone reading the hideous woman with the curly hair is not related to my family in any way, shape, or form. I’ve often referred to her as being the “low self-esteem” girlfriend of the attire designer. At the time I’m sure she was the best he could do (I mean, look at him) and he was probably really proud to showcase her in his ad (“Hey baby, I’ve got a surprise for you. You’re going to be famous, baby”).
1. Yeah! That scene is a riot. Then they start shooting through the ceiling/floor and the bunny carnage is actually pretty respectable.
2. I was psyched because Jessica Biel was in Blade 3 and then she turned out not to be that big a deal. I'm not criticizing her acting (although you can); she just didn't look nearly as appealing as she did in TCM. I think Jordan's guess is right: the cinematography was often worked around getting shots of her just right, which is fiiiine with me.
Other movies I can think of that similarly showcase their pretty actresses are Mulholland Drive and Clerks 2.
3. I remember when JPX and Summerisle were involved in that ad campaign. We were in 8th grade, and Pac-Man fever swept the land, killing thousands.
4. Hey! You jerk!
No, I totally get it. I love the sight of that huge platform of zombies, but I'll admit it's a bit shaky, plotwise.
That's an excellent write-in category. I was thinking of including "worst-looking monster" so I could dis the Triffids some more, but nah.
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