Thursday, February 28, 2008

How Many Jokes Can You Cram on the 'Superhero Movie' Poster?


From iwatchstuff, Let's count!

1. Simon Rex's equivalent of The Human Torch has caught himself on fire. See, traditionally The Human Torch has the power to manipulate fire at will. Why would he catch himself on fire?!

2. Wolverine is using said fire to roast marshmallows--on his claws! One would normally use a device that is not part of their mutant anatomy, like a long fork that doesn't come out of your wrist.

3. Leslie Nielsen's shirt says "With great power comes hot bitches"; the actual Spider-Man quote is "With great power comes great responsibility." This is funny because it's like a BustedTee, which are always funny.

4. Wolverine's middle claw is slightly longer than the other two. Those familiar with gestural expletives will love this one.

5. Storm is surprised she's electrocuting Professor X's penis.

6. The Cerebro helmet Professor X wears to focus his psychic powers is being used as a drink hat, an established comic prop. And he's black.

7. Though not explicitly laid out, the maturity of the rest of the gags imply Dragonfly guy probably has his penis in the popcorn. And he's giving Pamela Anderson a wet willy, which is sort of a joke if you're 8 and disgusting.

8. Pamela Anderson wears a necklace that says "Dynamic Duo". This term is synonymous with fictional crimefighters Batman and Robin, but holds a lewder meaning when balanced across Anderson's un-aging cleavage.

9. The unfortunate participation of all these desperate actors.

Did I miss any? It's hard for me to see them with my eyes squinted in unending laughter.

2 comments:

Johnny Sweatpants said...

*groan*

Can someone please tell me how it's possible that the Scary Movie people are still allowed to make movies? Oh that's right, most people are drooling brain-dead idiots who voted Bush into office twice and find lowest common denominator boob jokes amusing because it gives them an excuse not to think.

"BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!", says I.

Octopunk said...

I, too, heave a figurative fat, rotten tomato at this idea.

Malevolent

 2018  ***1/2 It's 1986 for some reason, and a team of paranormal investigators are making a big name for themselves all over Scotland. ...