Tuesday, October 10, 2006

Cat's Eye

(1985) **1/2



Unlike Octopunk, I purposefully jumped on I'mNotMarc's anthology train.  But after watching the 3rd story in Cat's Eye, I have decided to get off at the next stop and hitchhike.  These 3 segments are all based on works by Stephen King which as we all know, means nothing.   They tie the 3 stories together by presenting them through the eyes of a cat.  The first 2 could pass as pretty decent episodes of Alfred Hitchcock presents.   The 3rd one just plain sucks.  But the nostalgia factor was pretty high for me going into this movie. 

Determined to quit smoking once and for all, James Woods enlists the help of Quitters Incorporated. For all intents and purposes, he pays the mafia to spy on him around the clock.  If he's caught smoking a cigarette, they will kidnap his wife and throw her in an electric cage known as the "Cat Room".   A wonderfully paranoid half hour. 

In the Ledge, a fat millionaire forces his wife's lover into a wager consisting of making him walk around the ledge of a giant penthouse in the city, fighting both the wind and the pigeons pecking at his feet. By the way, it's not really a "wager" when there is no choice involved but that's neither here nor there…  In any event, I have a small wager of my own here: I'll bet you a smile that you'll find this segment fun and entertaining for the whole family!  

Which brings us to *sigh AND eyeball roll* the Gnome: Drew Barrymore, clearly aware of her cuteness at the time of filming, is visited by a killer gnome in the middle of the night who is intent on sucking the life out of her. Her bitchy mom blames the cat, but General is only trying to protect her!  The gnome and the cat fight to the death in front of a shameless blue screen.   Stupid, stupid, stupid.  

6 comments:

I'mnotMarcbutmyboyfriendis said...

beat me to it. i saw this one a ton when i was a kid. re: the drew barrymore segment: this is, essentially the predicament that chris griffin has with his little monkey dude. only this is much less scary.

Octopunk said...

You know what's really scary, there's this short story with Karen Black and a ferocious little Zuni warrior doll...

For me the crowning achievement of this movie is that, when the anti-smoking people throw your loved one into the electric floor room, there's music to go with the jumping up and down. That's just so mean.

JPX said...

Yeah, this was the moment when Drew Barrymore became unbearable. You just want to smash her.

Octopunk said...

Dang! I only saw this when it came out and maybe once after, I never got to the "hating Drew" stage, although I've heard this movie trashed by others before Summerisle.

At least it's her getting the grief and not the evil little gnome. Not like my poor maligned Zuni doll.

Can you imagine the two of them having coffee?

I'mnotMarcbutmyboyfriendis said...

yeah, the gnome would be sitting there, calmly sipping his mocha, what with his fully articulated hands and lips. meanwhile, the zuni dude would start by knocking his cup over with his poorly articulated shoulders, then after finally getting used to looping his clumsy arm through the cup handle, he'd lift it to his lips, only to have the coffee spill from his non-articulated jaw all over his moldy wooden torso. then he'd go "AAAARGHHHHHARAHRAHGHHRHAHGHHH!" and stab everyone in the joint. Cat's Eye gnome would be sitting there all along, sipping his mocha thinking, "damn, this is some good coffee!"

Octopunk said...

If you don't stop picking on my Zuni warrior I'm going to get you one for Christmas. Then we'll see who's laughing.