(1982) zero stars
Two grave robbers get the surprise of their lifetime when, while robbing the grave of “beautiful” (debatable) Catherine, an earthquake (or something) causes a chemical spill, which fills Catherine’s coffin with toxic ooze and brings her back to life. She immediately kills the robbers and we see copious amounts of blood Sam Peckinpah style. Despite being part of the living dead, Catherine manages to call her best buddy, Helene, who is still mourning Catherine’s death. Unfazed by Catherine’s new living dead status, Helene is immediately on board and has no problem providing her with victims (fresh blood) to keep Catherine alive (would my friends do this for me? hell no. jerks). Yep, that’s about it.
Helene being a pal.
No I’m not a pervert, these stills pretty much capture the essence of this terrible movie. Catherine is pretty much naked the entire time and any other female in the movie pretty much gets naked too. I read a bunch of reviews about this film before ever acquiring it and boy were they all misleading. Film descriptions make it sound like this is some lost Picasso. Here’s an example from a DVD review,
“Encore Films continues to show the oft forgotten director much love with their exceptionally well put together release of (what can only be described as) the director's most accessible work, Living Dead Girl. Ultra gory, but still as respectable and lyrical as his other efforts, Living Dead Girl is a great starting point for an introduction to Rollin's wealth or work.”
Make no mistake, Living Dead Girl is a story that could be told in 5 minutes but is padded for 90 (it felt like 600). There are many long, lingering scenes where nothing much happens at all (e.g., 5 minutes of Catherine just walking). “But she’s naked, with full frontal nudity!” you all cry. Let me tell you, the nude novelty wears off mighty fast. After a few minutes I found myself yelling at Catherine to, “Put some goddamn clothes on!” Terrible acting, poor production values, a glacially paced story, and bad music make this a complete and utter waste of celluloid.