Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Man Allegedly Kills Himself With A Robot


From geekology, Allegedly an 81 year-old man in Australia killed himself with a robot that he found the plans to build on the internet. The robot held a .22 pistol and fired when the dude pushed a button or something. Now call me crazy, but I don't think we're getting the full story here.

Evidence: 81 year-olds don't know how to use the internet. If they do it's to sign on to AOL and download a shit-ton of viruses or give their bank account information to a Nigerian exile.

Evidence: No 81 year-old can build a robot. All the geriatrics I know don't do anything but piss themselves and suck at guessing prices on The Price Is Right because their brains are so fucked.

So what can we conclude from this? Government. Conspiracy. Just kidding. But I will tell you what really happened. This man obviously built the robot a long time ago, when he was still reasonably sane (probably in his late 40's - 50's). Then his hearing started to go. Over the years he had to turn the volume on the television up louder and louder in order to watch Matlock and old Westerns. One day the robot got fed up with the noise, ordered a gun online, and blasted him. Case. Closed.

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Malevolent

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