Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Hump Day Challenge! Who shall pass into the Hall of Legends?

But first, check out this cute picture of what was actually not a very cute scene at all. As I think I mentioned elsewhere, both Julie and I started new jobs last week, which was exactly the week a rather buff strain of streptococcus bacteria decided to camp out in Zack. Poor kid spent most of the last EIGHT FREAKING DAYS as you see him here, doped up on Motrin so his fever would stop hitting the 104 mark. By far the longest he's ever been sick.

Yeah, suck. On Friday we got him some antibiotics which we thought would turn things around, but after an awful weekend we got real stuff. The strep had just laughed at the first batch, then was thankfully nuked by a shot of penicillin plus.

That's not totally an excuse for spacing on results posting and I am sorry about that. But he's better and we got through it and woo hoo for us.

So, getting to it: I was very, very amused at the output last week. We're still not hitting the numbers like we used to (where is that sister of mine?) but the percentage of truly awesome work was at Olympian levels. Stan hit me early with this one:

Roll, roll, roll the rock
Almost...there...stay on target
Fuck me. Roll, roll, roll...

Which tickled me because I'd been thinking Sisyphus would be a great subject and also because he got a Star Wars reference in there. Nice. This rocked, too:

I'll take that fire, thanks
Humans, enjoy your warm S'mores
Don't really need guts

(When I captioned the Prometheus picture I went for that awesome line from The Critic, but I often think of Prometheus, a la the Wicked Witch from Oz, saying "How about some nice FIRE, humanity?" So this one hit the spot, too.)

AC had this beauty:

greek gods tho potent and famous
behaviorally were quite heinous
they did as they pleased
but i'll bet they were teased
cuz grandfather's name was "uranus"

Knowledgable and raunchy at the same time, and a limerick! While I will always encourage free form poetry, I must say I do fancy the limerick. A lot of you chose limericks this week, and yay for that.

The winner, however, is Catfreeek, for the amazing account of Paul Bunyan's enormous genitalia.

Paul Bunyan was a great big man
who wielded a great big axe
He hung around with and Ox named Babe
whose as blue as a sailor's sac
His legend tells of many things
the big man was a hero
but I have always been curious
why his love life was a zero
perhaps the man was somewhat shy
or has issues with cleanness
Maybe he just scared them off
with his enormous penis

Johnny nearly took it with the follow up:

The things I would do
If I wielded Bunyon’s schlong
I'd achieve world peace

That right there is the kind of lateral thinking that makes it a pleasure to know JSP.

But in the end I had to give it to Cat for numerous little victories. Being the first to highlight PB's junk for one thing, this gem about Medusa (another limerick!):

Medusa was once a great beauty
to Poseidon she gave up her cootie
but they picked the wrong place
Athena messed up her face
What a big price to pay for some booty

...and the real clincher was the following. I love it when Hump Day results in a blogger back-and-forth, and this one goes 1) Cat's Paul Bunyan poem 2) Johnny's hilarious world peace haiku (sporting, I must mention, the HI-larious smug Dennis the Menace avatar that's so recently fashionable, which leads to...)

Dennis tub bubbles
his Mother had it all wrong
released the Kraken

Holy crap does that make me laugh, and it's a Clash of the Titans reference to boot. No, it's THE Clash of the Titans reference.

So that's that! Congrats to all of you (including those I didn't mention specifically) on a great batch of work, and sorry once again for my ongoing tardiness.

It's yours now, Cat... another Thursday challenge? Perhaps this should be discussed in the comments.


AC said...

congratulations, catfreeek!

poor zack, glad to hear he's on the mend.

thanks for the hm, octopunk, and for reminding us all of the classic short "l'artiste est morte" (catered by jay prescott sherman). i just watched it on youtube and it still holds up beautifully.

Catfreeek said...

Oh wow, thanks Octo. Poor Zack, I feel for him I was sick too:(

So what does everyone say, a Thursday poetry slam or wait til next week?

DCD said...

Och, the poor, wee lad!

Total suckage about Z being sick, happy to hear he is on the mend.

I have no excuses for my lack of participation. Something has happened to my Wednesdays and I can't seem to get it together.