50 churns butterWhile we write about futureVery, very odd
All hail the robots!Angry, horrible robotsEnslave you & me
SkyNet "self-aware" Would've happened alreadyOr...happening...NOW?????
Handsome Stan alone hereHorrorthonners have vanishedBleak dystopia
No, seriouslyWhere's my damn robot butler?I've been quite patient
The future is nowThe past never existedPass me that spliff, man
"The future is now"That never made any senseNow is the presentA "Space Odyssey"Eight years later, still no HALThe space shuttle sucksThe future I wantNo religion and no PopeFinally world peace
That's funny because I wrote that "future is now" bit before seeing that you had written one!Back to the FuturePart III took place in the pastFalse advertising
Brain chips placed at birthAccess knowledge instantlyA new race is born
The future on filmBlade Runner city was weird What, no zoning laws?
Robot butler - good.Flying cars - even better.Headless clone - priceless.They had lightsabersA long, long, long time agoWhy can't we make them?
Attack Ships on Fireoff Shoulder of OrionAndroid tears in rainDay I get jetpackFinally be able to moonJ. Sweatpants from skyDon't care if car fliesOr we can visit the starsI want sex robotI dream of the dayPostapocalyptic hordeis mine to commandCannibalismReally not a bad ideaThe other white meat
Walking on the beachThe Statue of LibertyThe future scares me
It's Mt. EverestThe last scene in WaterworldThe future scares me
Woody Allen's takeGiant fruit, Orgasmatronand that mystic orbSo, in the futureManhattan's a big prisonBorgnine drives a cabThe biggest badassis an eye patch guy named SnakeYup, makes sense to me
Sex with a robot?I did that for many yearsHave you met my ex?
A dismal futurePatrick Swayze and some teenshave to save the worldDesolate livingBig muscle cars but no gasMel Gibson kicked assPoor old George JetsonStuck going around and roundJane, what the fuck man!
JSP you're killing me
In a few decadesEvery one of us will dieKind of depressing
In a few decadesWe'll have cyborg body partsKind of really coolNot so fast on "death" -Upload your mind to the cloudNew cloned body: DoneWe're doomed anywayTwelve-twenty-one twenty-twelveEnd of history
Even if Johnny doesn't win this week, I hereby vote for that "sex with a robot" haiku to enter the Haiku Hall of Fame. Funniest. Haiku. Ever.
I thought Lazer TagWas the wave of the futureCouldn't be wrongerThen there was "Photon"An even lamer versionWith retard helmets
Don't you think Jetsonswas really just the FlintstonesWith way cooler stuffBender is the faveWell, for most people that isFor me it's ZoidbergI just turned 30Uh oh, crystal is blinkingOff to CarouselWait! Stop! Don't eat that!They've been lying to us all!Soylent Green's people!
Hive mind emergingCell phones and chips in our brainsSingularityOne thing's for certainPeople will keep getting fatAnd also dumber(Contradictory haikus. So what, big whoop, you wanna fight about it?)
The future is bleakI'll just sit here wasting timewriting more haikusNostradamus wrotequatrains predicting our fatebut we don't listen
I see the futureIn less than 90 minutesI'll be drinking beer
I always wonderedHow they made people intolittle green crackersHave to wonder What does soylent green taste like?Is it like chicken?What a shit futureNothing to eat but crackersthey need recipes
"Always in motionThe future is." Jeez, Yoda.That crap don't give me.
50 years from nowMiddle East - giant craterThanks to religionMore technologyMakes mass murder easierA matter of timeTwo different peopleWith a claim to the same landWhy can't they just share?'Cuz their holy booksGive divine entitlementThey're doing "God's work"Only if we shed This "faith is a virtue" crapWill humans survive
Actually threeJews, Jesus, and Islam guysOne city. SO fun!Another cityWould solve problems immenselyIslam, take ClevelandFuture should lead toThe Death of Faith. But it won't.People get dumber.
Times get worse. More fearWhich is easy to exploitMan! Bummer haikus
Damn holo pornstarFrakker's on the fritz againDamn Mickey Mouse head
Forget flying carsDon't care about cyborg partsBeam me UP, Scotty!
Transporter mishapWon me a big lawsuit, butDamn Mickey Mouse head
That holo pornstar one is straight out of the back page of Wired. Genius.Here's news: from aboveCities look like computersAnd we become them
"Frakker's on the fritz" - that's some seriously frakking GREAT stuff!Death Star, BattlestarAll in our past. Our future?Not as cool as that
What will solve problemsIs that Mr. Fusion thingGarbage as our fuelFuck recyclingGarbage will overwhelm usWall-E had it right
the year three thousandwhite mice rule the universedoug adams was right
nuclear falloutearth a desolate wastelandyet keith richards lives
who knew that "watchmen"would spark the next fashion craze?blue cocks the new black
orwell and huxleywere never THIS dystopic:palin president!
the suicide notewill be pinned to hanging corpse:"my name's not gretchen"
anthropologistsifts through techno-artifactswhat's this "horrorthon"?
AC that suicide Gretchen one is hilarious!
hope there's a futurein which i forget sweatpants'sack is called "tweety"
can't wait for next LOSTstop yelling, i'm on topic:next week's in future.
Optimus said itWe all just need to listen:"Until all are one"All minds convergingShared collective consciousnessBlue states will be first
AC came on strong at the end! Love the Gretchen one and I was pleased to see good old "Tweety" getting a mention. Handsome Stan I love the Cities look like computers and we become them one!
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