Thursday, September 17, 2009

HHD Results: JPX - Clearly the Most Sinful of the Bunch

You wish!

AC was the first to tackle the sins, my favorites being:

I'm not that greedy
except for concerts, massage,
and fabulous food.

Guess I am greedy
not materialistic
but greedy as hell

Screw you Johnny Sweatpants!

Followed by Johnny Sweatpants who put the pope in his place:

The pope is a dope
Without lust we’d be extinct
Not to mention dull

Indulge, you know you want to.

Trevor (Tami's friend) pointed the finger at Gluttony:

Most sins we indulge
Gluttony - most shunned
Too many diet products

As did Mr. AC with his devilish dilemma:

Is it more sinful
To binge on devil's food cake
Or angel food cake?

and DCD with her admittance of a guilty pleasure:

Gluttony you say?
Shut-up and pass me that tube
of raw cookie dough.

Way to go Sinners!

While Handsome Stan embraced the awesomeness of sin:

Deadly sins feel GREAT
Problem is the adjective

as did 50PageMcGee:

sex the "other" way
with your girlfriend's hot sister
can't say no to that

and Julie:

Cover me in cake
Lie me on a bed of gold
And do me. That's three.

.... .... my butt

Which brings me to my dilemma. Early on Octopunk had it pretty much sewed up with his follow up to the hilarious Aspray ad:

Vanity tells me
Must spray this stuff all over
No more smell


my butt

Now this had me guffawing like a fool just thinking about that Aspray testimonial guy. I thought it was a done deal, then...

JPX came whooshing in firing off 5 haikus that had me rolling in hysterics.
First these 4:

My cell phone just sucks
My patient has an iPhone
I hate my patient

Least favorite patients?
That's easy, narcissism
No, you're not that great!

Why is "pride" a sin?
Won a Chicago album
I was pretty proud

Gluttony's a sin?
Ate large bag of candy corn
True, my teeth did hurt

but it was this last one that did me in:

Want to see no pride
And plenty of gluttony?
Just go to Walmart

Quite simply put and oh so true. It got me thinking immediately of the recently discovered People of Walmart site. Which you know I immediately went to after reading this, and found this gem of a picture, including caption.

Kinda like a ghetto C-3PO

That sealed the deal for me. I am still laughing about it. Congratulations JPX, good luck next week! Great job everyone!


Johnny Sweatpants said...

Handsome Stan was totally robbed this week.

AC said...

congratulations jpx! long overdue in my opinion. thanks for the hm catfreeek!

HandsomeStan said...

No, no, no - that Walmart one was spot-frikkin ON. I loved it!

I was going to say that this was overall one of the most intelligent diplays on everyone's part. I felt we all were a notch up on the smart-o-meter. Especially when I worked "boner" into a haiku. great topic, Cat!

Cangrats, JPX!

50PageMcGee said...

i kind of thought sloth and prejudice had a shot

Catfreeek said...

Sloth and Predjudice was brilliant and it was under consideration against Octo's ... butt until JPX threw that Walmart one out.

I used to work at Walmart. My appreciation for that haiku runs deep, very deep.

DCD said...

Congrats all round! Great topic, Cat!

JPX said...

Wow, I don't know what to say except, you were all robbed! I have not been able to get on the blog at work for some reason so I was saddened that I was not able to participate more in the haikus yesterday. I truly don't deserve to win, but I'll take it! Thanks, Cat!

Octopunk said...

Nah, you deserve it! You jerk.

You'll be hearing from my butt.