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Malevolent
2018 ***1/2 It's 1986 for some reason, and a team of paranormal investigators are making a big name for themselves all over Scotland. ...
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I’m sure none of you except for JPX knows that I’m a bit of a germ-a-phobic. It’s annoying, but manageable. Though, since I met JPX and list...
17 comments:
On the bright side it reminds me of that Six Feet Under episode in which a woman sticks her head out of the sunroof and it gets crushed.
Has it taken this long to make a Marmaduke movie? Seems like that cash tap would've been hit already.
Someone please take that dog out back and shoot him.
I can't remember the last dog or any live animal family movie that I liked. Maybe Babe, that one was kinda cute.
"That'll do, pig" still gets me kind of choked up. Every time. Totally concur. And damn it all if Milo & Otis doesn't pull the same damn heartstrings.
Why can't we just combine shit, and have an AVP movie with Garfield & Marmaduke? GVM.
I've always hated Marmaduke with a passion, simply because he's a breed of dog (and a size) that I would NEVER own, and he's always on the couch or in the way, or probably drooling on shit. And stinks up the house (presumably) with his Big Dog Funk. Ugh. Enraged, indeed.
And he probably takes GIANT dumps. Let's see some live-action footage of the hapless dad owner carrying a garbage bag behind Marmaduke on a walk to scoop up everything.
This marks the first I'm hearing about this movie, and I sincerely hope it's almost the last.
If they had balls, Marmaduke would go rabid, attack Dennis the Menace next door, and then eat the Family Circus children. I would TOTALLY get behind that movie. We could eliminate all the clutter from the comics page in one swoop.
Hmm, Dennis the Menace wasn't as irksome as the Circus kids. I say the rabid pooch goes for Mr. Wilson, clamps down on his ankle, drags him around the neighborhood, comes across one of those meandering dotted lines the Circus kids trail behind them, follows it home and eats everybody.
At the funeral, attended by nobody except the invisible Not Me, Marmaduke's ass end is seen in the background, as he is jumping between panels to wreak more bloody justice in Cathy (first panel, Cathy reacts by sweating, saying "Ack!").
I like it! A Horrorthon film project?
However Stan, I actually like the breed. In fact if I owned a dog it would be a great dane. But since I could never ever see myself following a dog around with an old shopping bag to pick up a hot steaming pile a poop I'll stick to my cats. If I ever move to the country where a dog has oodles of land to roam free and poop at will without inconveniencing me then I may change my mind. And I wouldn't name it Marmaduke.
Oh and Milo & Otis is a gem, I love that film.
Panel 1: Rex Morgan MD answers phone. "What's that? A Great Dane wreaking havoc? Yes, I'll be right - "
Panel 2: Marmaduke crashes through the door, wild-eyed and trailing foam and blood. Rex drops the phone in terror, backing away.
Panel 3: Spiderman, flying by over Rex's office. Thought bubble with squiggly "thought lines": "My Spidey sense is tingling! And on the way to my anniversary dinner with MJ, no less!"
To be continued? I think we may have something here...
(I love the fact that only Not Me is at the funeral.)
"I've always hated Marmaduke with a passion, simply because he's a breed of dog (and a size) that I would NEVER own, and he's always on the couch or in the way, or probably drooling on shit. And stinks up the house (presumably) with his Big Dog Funk."
Yes! My sentiments exactly. I don't enjoy horse-sized dogs.
Hahaha! This is the funniest frickin' thread in Horrorthon history! Thanks Stan and Octo for the unexpected bellyaching laughter.
"And stinks up the house (presumably) with his Big Dog Funk."
I agree, I hate those big, stupid animals. They do absolutely NOTHING and expect you to love them unconditionally.
Don't all domestic animals do nothing and expect unconditional love?
I would also love to see a rabid Marmaduke take out Prince Valiant, Dilbert & the annoying bickering couple from The Better Half. Andy Capp would be so drunk he wouldn't know what hit him. Perhaps Marmaduke would in turn infect Daisy(Blondie) and Ruff(Dennis the Menace). Tell me you would like to see ol' Ruff go to town on Dennis.
Then finally a heated battle with Hagar the Horrible.
Great Danes, and what's the other giant asshole? Mastiffs? Why on earth would anyone bring such an animal into the home? Why not just own a horse that wants to clamber up on the couch and the bed?
I could see owning a fleet of those dogs to guard the perimeter of your home against intruders/small out of control cars, etc. But IN the house?
Weirdly, because this thread has been so funny, I've now emotionally come full circle on the original picture. Where I used to get feelings of rage, now the picture just makes me chuckle uncontrollably.
Or maybe that's a half-circle, emotionally.
I like this Comics Page Mash-Up idea - let's hear some more from the peanut gallery! (except for all of the mastiff-lovers on the blog whom I've now permanently offended...sorry, folks!)
Stan, I just told Tony about this thread but had not read it to him and his first thought was sic the dog on Rex Morgan MD. It scares me that you two think alike far too often.
I've always been a HUGE Tony fan. And I'm still waiting to continue our 9/11 Conspiracy conversation that got cut short...
Maybe you can do that on the 26th when we all get together;)
Well, nothing says Christmas more than the phrase "controlled demolition."
"Controlled demolition." Hmmmm....isn't that another name for Marmaduke?
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