Wednesday, May 07, 2008
Pastor Deacon Fred's Review of Iron Man
Posted by Julie
From LandoverBaptist.org: The first thing you have to understand about the movie, "Iron Man," is that it is based on a super hero comic book series. For those of you who are not aware, super hero comic books are cartoon-style magazines read by effeminate young boys who don't play sports. I'm going to put it bluntly - and ladies, close your ears now, or ask your husband later - comic book readers are given toward a lifestyle of masturbation directed toward men wearing leotards. Thankfully, in a civilized society, these little perverts are not able to fulfill their disgusting fantasies in our school gymnasiums unless, of course, they are attending school in England, where boys learn to prance about like homosexuals in the first grade! In God's Country, America, if a sissy hankers toward a mastrabatorial fantasy in the school gym, God willing, there will be a True Christian™ jock, on hand to beat the devil out of them.
I've never opened a comic book in my life, and to be honest with you - I've never seen the film, "Iron Man." I don't have to! Amen? Jesus, the Holy Spirit who dwells within me, and a few hours of TMZ work as a guide to figuring out what this movie is really all about on a spiritual level that unsaved people will never understand or appreciate.
The general idea of every super hero story is always the same, a mild mannered man gets super powers and tries to save the world without the blessing of Jesus Christ. I bet you didn't know that most authors of these stories steal their ideas from the Bible. You see, Jesus had super powers (He still does!) and He can fly.
And yes, it's a joke.
at 8:31 PM