This big budget remake of the classic television series begins with a road trip featuring Dan Akroyd back when he was a highly sought after actor. Within seconds he proves why never deserved the honor. He and his fellow passenger discuss how great the Twilight Zone was (as if they even need to sell it). Akroyd then rips his face off, turns into a blue ghoul, missing the entire point of 6 years of brilliant storytelling. Then, after Burgess Meredith's voiceover that tries a little too hard to sound like Rod Serling, the first of four abominations gets underway.
The first and only original episode in the film is loosely based on the episodes A Quality of Mercy and the excellent Deaths-Head Revisited. A belligerent racist, sexist jackass goes out of his way to insult every non-Aryan that is capable of being offended. Suddenly he finds himself a victim of police brutality at the height of Nazi Germany. It’s satisfying for a minute or so as he learns his valuable lesson. Long after the lesson is learned though, he suffers oppression by a host of other hate-mongers including the Ku Klux Klan. We get it. He gets it. Everyone gets it. Can we move on now? This segment featured the infamous helicopter crash that decapitated the lead actor and two Vietnamese children.
In the second segment, an elderly community reconnects with their inner children through an old game called Kick the Can (Hide and Seek meets Tag). While the original episode was pleasing in a fuzzy, heart-warming way, it in no way deserved the big screen treatment. To exacerbate the situation, they attempted to improve the story by throwing buckets and buckets of extra sap on top. It’s called Twilight Zone, not Midday Sunshine Crappy Hour. Spielberg directed this one and I'm not sure if even Schindler's List made up for it.
In It's a Good Life, a young boy gets everything he desires as he has unusual powers that can transform imagination into reality. In other words, he can do or have anything he wants. Though the Simpsons Treehouse of Horrors version is a tad scarier, I was only moderately outraged this time. Perhaps I was just no longer capable of being disappointed.
The fourth and mercifully last episode to get the 80’s makeover is called Nightmare at 20,000 Feet. John Lithgow steps into William Shatner’s shoes in one of the most popular Zones out there. Man sees a monster sabotaging the wing of the airplane. Everybody thinks he’s crazy but he’s not. Personally I never much cared for the source material but a lot of folks seem to enjoy it. But again the director misses the point. Instead of focusing on the peculiar situation (is this really happening?) they instead turn it into a lumbering, third rate monster movie.
The only conclusion that can be drawn from this movie is that its intentions were twofold. The first was to do everything in their power to ruin the legacy of one of television’s greatest shows as well as dance on Rod Serling’s grave. The second was to underestimate and insult the intelligence of the audience. If nothing else it makes a case for censorship. I was doing just fine before they got around to releasing it on DVD a couple of weeks ago.
3 comments:
Wow, mega-harsh! I always liked the blue ghoul bit at the beginning, but I guess you're right that it ain't true to da T-Zone.
However, the scene in which Nancy Cartwright is sent into a menacing world of Fleischer-style cartoons would definitely get this a two-star rating from me. I haven't seen the complete movie since 1983, but I've happened across that scene on TV and I love it.
I admit it might be the one good idea the movie has.
yeah, i really liked the nancy cartwright sequence as well. also, i was only a tot when i saw this in the theater and that kevin mccarthy rabbit scene gave me nightmares for weeks.
so i dug TZ:TM, but i can see it pissing off a loyalist.
burgess meredith did the voice overs?
"that's the next sign post up ahead, rock! get over a few lanes or you'll miss it, ya dumb sonofabitch!"
Many people consider this film uneven, which is nearly unavoidable when you're creating an anthology film. The tone does shift dramatically from story to story. Over the years, my favorite stories in the film have evolved. As a kid, I hated the first two stories and loved Joe Dante's segment the most; as an adult, I love all the stories but prefer either the first or fourth stories the most.
Post a Comment