Tales From the Hood

(1995) **

Tales From the Hood is another in the seemingly endless series of anthology films that attempts to capture the magic of the Twilight Zone. In the wraparound segment of this film three street hoods in South Central LA travel to a funeral home to purchase narcotics from creepy mortuary owner Mr. Simms. Simms informs the trio that the drugs are hidden deep within the eerie dwelling and as they make their way to the precious cargo he regales them with tales about some of his recent “customers”.



In “Rogue Cop Revelation” rookie police officer Clarence Smith witnesses his Caucasian partner and two other policeman murder a city councilman who has been investigating police corruption. Conflicted by what he sees, Clarence quits the force and a year later we find him wandering the streets as a drunk. While in his inebriated state he has a vision of the dead councilman beckoning him to bring the crooked cops to his gravesite for some street justice.



In "Boys Do Get Bruised" young Walter arrives at school with bruises covering his face. When his teacher inquires about the troubling injuries Walter tells him that a monster attacked him. Walter continues to exhibit bruises and his concerned teacher pays a visit to Walter’s household. Walter’s mother attributes the injuries to Walter’s clumsiness and nothing more. We soon learn that Walter’s “monster” is his stepfather and Walter has had enough of his stepfather’s abuse…



In “Comeuppance” former Klansman Duke Metzger is working on a campaign commercial while protesters march outside of his office window. The racist senator is working on an image makeover with an African American assistant who ignores the senator’s racist quips while trying to help him get re-elected. Hanging in the senator’s office is a large painting of a former voodoo witch surrounded by her voodoo dolls, all of which were representations of former slaves. While working with the senator the assistant trips and falls down a staircase to his death. Soon the senator notices that one of the dolls is missing from the painting, and he finds the doll on the staircase where the assistant tripped. One by one the dolls begin disappearing from the painting and eventually the senator must pay for his racist ways.



In “Crazy K” a violent street hood is shot by the police but manages to survive. While serving his prison term he is given the opportunity for early release if he agrees to participate in a research study. Crazy K is transferred to a shady facility where a Clockwork Orange-ish deprogramming attempts to show him the impact that his life of violence has had on the African American community. As Crazy K continues to resist the “treatment” he is given one more chance to atone or else suffer the consequences.


Rod Serling he isn't

The more I watch these anthology films, including The Twilight Zone Movie, the more I appreciate the genius of The Twilight Zone television series. A number of years ago I purchased the entire series for my parents and they brought the set to their Vermont home where we watch episodes whenever any of us stay there. The remote location coupled with the utter silence that Vermont offers creates the perfect venue to view the old, creepy series. How come no one else has been able to create a modern anthology series that captures tales of dark irony as effectively as The Twilight Zone did in the 1950s? Shows like Tales From The Dark Side, Monsters, Freddy’s Nightmares, and The New Twilight Zone all stink. Even Spielberg’s Amazing Stories was more miss than hit (with the “The Shadow Man” being an exception).

When looking up this film I found these quotes,
"...[TALES] succeeds in sending us home giddy....Sublime, ghoulish..." -- Rating: B -- Owen Gleiberman, Entertainment Weekly

"...A smart and sassy horror anthology that mixes blunt shocks and sharp satire....Fearsome and ferociously funny as well as socially conscious..." -- Joe Leydon, Variety

"...Scabrously funny....A powerhouse of a movie, TALES FROM THE HOOD is operatic, great-looking, fast-moving, action-filled, tough-minded yet often hilarious and bursting with imagination..." -- Kevin Thomas, Los Angeles Times

"...There is obviously much creativity behind this project....The film offers some dynamic special effects..." -- Avis L. Weathersbee, Chicago Sun-Times

These people are wrong; Tales From the hood is resoundingly awful. My sense is that reviewers were afraid to criticize it because it is a “message” film (i.e. racism is bad, child abuse is bad, killing your own is bad, etc). While I can’t argue with the message I will state with conviction that these short stories are bad. Even the killer dolls story, which is usually my Achilles heel, fails to deliver anything that we haven’t seen a thousand times before. These days when I watch anthology films I’m always optimistic that I’m going to get at least one good story but more often than not I don’t even get that.