Monday, October 29, 2012

Little Deaths

 (2011) **1/2

This sexually themed horror anthology is strange and disjointed. The film is composed of three unrelated short episodes, the first of which is the only one that has any merit.

The first segment involves a rich couple who enjoys luring in homeless girls so they can have their way with them. They make a fatal error when their latest victim, after being bound and raped gets revenge in a most satisfying way.

You can't see my four foot schlong in this picture
but believe me it's there alright.
 The second episode was the cause of a huge embarrassment for me. My son Paul decided to stop by with his girlfriend and I happened to have this movie on. After making them dinner as we were eating I unpaused it figuring what the hell, its just horror. Well, this nonsensical short which was extremely difficult to follow suddenly shows us a weird horrific guy chained up with a mask over his face. The camera then pans down showing us his yardstick long, thick as a forearm heavily veined monster cock just flopping around like it’s nobody’s business. The room went silent and I wanted to crawl under my chair. Thanks so much for that Little Deaths, sorry Erin & Paul.

The third is a story of revenge involving dogs and a guy who acts like a dog. He even gets naked, puts on a dog mask and lifts his leg to pee on everything.

So, the first tale is really the only reason to watch this unless you really want to see that enormous schlong.  Venture if you must but don’t say I didn’t warn you.


Johnny Sweatpants said...

Hilarious! You must have been mortified. Was it a French movie? I always thought it was weird that they call orgasms "les petites morts" (little deaths).

Landshark said...

Ha! But seriously, that had to happen at some point, and really, based on many others you've reviewed, it coulda been a lot worse.

Catfreeek said...

Oh it could have been worse, very true.

Octopunk said...

Ha! Loved this review.

A guy once told me that some female friends that were visiting him got into a conversation about how misogynistic anime was, and he said "naww, c'mahhn" and as proof suggested they watch the one he'd just rented, even though he hadn't seen it yet and didn't know what it was about.

Well, it was Overfiend: Legend of the Demon Womb, one of the core flicks in the "tentacle rape" genre. Oops.

Catfreeek said...

That's sticking his tentacle in his mouth, huh. Hilarious!

Abduscias said...

I love the Overfiend series! First Japanese"cartoon" I watched. I know there's another word for it, but can't remember.

Tami said...

What a review! I started with the thought, "there's nothing successfully sexual about those teeth" smoothly transitioned to hand over mouth "oh no" empathy for the collective embarrassment of the yardstick long shlong moment, to laugh out loud relief from it not also having the tentacle rape Octo mentioned in his comment. You guys all win!