Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Uwe Boll is mad and he's not going to take it anymore!

From AICN, "Hey folks, Harry here... This is kinda hilarious. It reminds me of Scorpio in the original DIRTY HARRY - getting himself all torn up by some bastard, just to get more attention. Uwe Boll is fed up with people criticizing his films and writing reviews of his shi... cinema without at least seeing the excretable assclingers for themselves. And he's decided that he wants to give them a shot at beating the living shit out of him. Or - he's going to beat the living shit out of you.

Not since Joe Louis vs Max Schmeling - has there been so great a bout with a German. Think about it... this is your chance to be Christopher Walken to his Martin Sheen... "The ice... is gonna break!" I'd kill to have Quint battle Boll. I think it would have an amazing Pay-Per-View options. 10 rounds... Quint v Boll. Hell, that shit makes Drago v. Balboa seem like chicken feed.

'Towards the end of the filming of Postal, the five most outspoken critics will be flown into Vancouver and supplied with hotel rooms. As a guest of Uwe Boll they will be given the chance to be an extra/stand-in in Postal and have the opportunity to put on boxing gloves and enter a BOXING RING to fight Uwe Boll. Each critic will have the opportunity to bring down Uwe in a 10-bout match. There will be five matches planned over the last two days of the movie. Certain scenes from these boxing matches will become part of the Postal movie. All five fights will be televised on the Internet and will be covered by international press.

To be eligible you must be a critic who has posted on the Internet or have written in magazines/newspapers at least two extremely negative articles in the year 2005. Critics of 2006 will not be considered.

Folks between 140 and 190 pounds, send an email to info@boll.kg.de and help Uwe prove that he isn't a bad filmmaker through physical violence.'

Shit. We'll have to put Quint on jello and jump ropes. Seriously though folks... if you have boxing experience and can kick some serious ass... and you've posted negative shit on Uwe Boll over the last few years... well then, here's your chance to end the pain with bloody gloves."

1 comment:

Octopunk said...

"To be eligible you must be a critic who has posted on the Internet or have written in magazines/newspapers at least two extremely negative articles in the year 2005."

Does the Horrorthon count? I've got exactly two!

Salem's Lot 1979 and Salem's Lot 2024

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