Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Haiku Hump Day: Fanboys/Fangirls (i.e., nerds)

55 comments:

HandsomeStan said...

I've missed the last couple, not through personal choice, just holiday craziness. I know it appears that I have an "Only SW" clause to my haiku contract, but that's not true. Anyway, ahem ahem...

Chicks don't like figures
Jedi mind tricks won't help you
You'll never get laid

Which sounds a lot harsher than I intended. Number 2:

You! With the costume!
Let's watch the Sci-Fi channel
And use the word "frak"

JPX said...

She wouldn't do it
"Please wear the Leia costume!"
Begging never works

JPX said...

Sci-fi convention
Why do they all have B.O?
Jesus, take a bath

JPX said...

His breath was rancid
"The latest Batman is in"
Comic shop owner

JPX said...

She was annoying
"How can you not like Star Wars?
I got dumped again

Johnny Sweatpants said...

Star Wars isn't cool
The force is illogical
I'm with Mr. Spock

HandsomeStan said...

Costumes everywhere
Chewie, Artoo, and Virgil
I love conventions

HandsomeStan said...

Thon bloggers, all nerds
How come it's just me and you?
Bring it on, suckers!

HandsomeStan said...

Lightsaber broken
Vader mask isn't breathing
Worst. Fanboy. Ever.

HandsomeStan said...

I am an adult
Yet I still wear Underoos
Outside in public

Johnny Sweatpants said...

Whatever Batman
Wolverine would kick your ass
I'd pay to see that

Johnny Sweatpants said...

I like comic books
They make my penis feel big
Did I just type that?

JPX said...

She dressed as Leia
Her costume was just perfect
Yikes, 300 pounds

Johnny Sweatpants said...

Who would you sleep with?
Batgirl or Wonder Woman?
I need a girlfriend

Whirlygirl said...

You guys are cracking me up.

HandsomeStan said...

See? Chicks ARE impressed.
Now let me recite each word
From The Holy Grail

HandsomeStan said...

Rogue is the hottest
Batgirl's no Mary Marvel
And then there's She-Hulk

Catfreeek said...

She didn't know me
Insulted, such ignorance
I'm Darth Nilus, duh!

Catfreeek said...

Waiting a lifetime
most important of life's tasks
Shatner's signature

JPX said...

Was that a Howard Stern reference, Catfreek?

Rare action figure
"It's worth a lot of money!"
God, I need a life

JPX said...

Tuna fish sandwich
Watching the bionic man
Where did life go wrong?

JPX said...

"Star Wars or Star Trek?"
Common convention question
Can't I like them both?

HandsomeStan said...

I've been trying to work "action figure" in all afternoon - bravo!

taH pagh taHbe'.
DaH mu'tlheghvam vIqelnIS.
quv'a', yabDaq San vaQ

If THAT isn't a nerd haiku, I don't know WHAT is...anyone?

JPX said...

Playing New Wave songs
Boom box with cassette player
Man, I miss those years

Catfreeek said...

Why yes it was ;P

She was unnoticed
Glued two danish to her head
now she is Leia

JPX said...

Shakesphere sounds better
When recited in Klingon
At least nerds think this

Catfreeek said...

is that Klingon?

HandsomeStan said...

J-P-X! J-P-X! J-P-X!

I was about to post:

Can't believe this blog
No one even recognizes
Phonetic Klingon

I can't believe you even worked my SOURCE material into a haiku! My vote for #1! All hail JPX!

Catfreeek said...

how sad is this that we actually know what it is, lol

Catfreeek said...

JPX gets my vote too, you are truly the ubernerd

JPX said...

Awesome day ahead
This costume used to fit me
Star Trek Convention

HandsomeStan said...

I thought I had this week's vote locked up with using fucking Klingon. I hadn't counted on JPX's "Klingon ne sais quoi," though...

Catfreeek said...

Playing for keeps now
Magic the Gathering rules!
D&D is dead*


*That was for my son and his former obsession

HandsomeStan said...

Friday night at home
Both trilogies of Star Wars
Nary a woman

HandsomeStan said...

(I'll keep going until more people vote, I suppose)

Several hundred bucks
Brand new Stormtrooper armor
It was that or food

JPX said...

Who is the best Bond?
Why can't I like all of them?
The answer is Moore

Catfreeek said...

Oh dear conventions
Where knowledge makes me a God
Unlike home with Mom

Octopunk said...

Got blue ribbon dreams
Damn tauntaun suit is itchy
Con was last week? Frak.

Octopunk said...

Lined up on my shelves
Pieces of The Adventure
That I get to keep

Octopunk said...

Got Friday night buzz
Stack of new anime, chips
Life is freakin' sweet

Catfreeek said...

Hate to disagree
but I prefer Connery
well, when he was young

HandsomeStan said...

Don't they understand?
You can't go to the bathroom
As C-3PO

Landshark said...

Box set came today!
Firefly marathon starts
when kids get to sleep...

AC said...

guess i missed my chance
too busy to blog today
love the topic though.

rather read watchmen
than watch sports of any kind
who you calling nerd?

gender split midst nerds:
boys like moore's bond, girls prefer
hot young connery.

i adore johnny
but don't need to read haikus
about his penis.

johnny's rebuttal:
my penis my penis my
penis MY PENIS!!!

AC said...

landshark has firefly?
potent nerd-fodder indeed.
if true, post review!

Octopunk said...

Review as follows
Awesome, awesome, and awesome
Firefly rules OK

JPX said...

LOST is starting soon
Which means I'll be home Thursdays
My phone will be off

Catfreeek said...

Captain Mal Reynolds
Of the awesome Firefly
Used to act on soaps

Catfreeek said...

Yay! Can't wait for LOST!
Damn! Sawyer is oh so hot
Desmond's not bad too

AC said...

firefly rules of course
post review of box set please
any good extras?

desmond, sawyer, jack;
sayid's not bad, and let's not
leave out "island" kate.

dr. horrible's
singalong blog: NPH,
fillion, whedon!

AC said...

haiku hump day, we
craft nerd-themed poems, clever.
nerd-dom's pinnacle.

Landshark said...

It's gorran awesome
of course. Been a few years though
so I am overdue.

Octopunk said...

Boys like Moore? No way!
He's like your rich gay uncle
Connery, then Craig

nowandzen said...

Glasses propped nose
Marching to a different drum
Galaxies beyond

JPX said...

Moore is the fun Bond
Sean C. is a narcissist
I want to punch him