From Darkhorizons, "A new official poster has been released for "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning along with a new synopsis.
The original 1974 film "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", shocked and stunned audiences with its bone-chillingly realistic portrayal [of how much Texas sucks]. The horrifying story, drawn from a series of true events [more accurately portrayed in the much tamer movie Deranged, but whatever], is considered by many to be one of the greatest thrillers of all time [really?] and a landmark of terror that has influenced countless films in its wake [actually, the number is six]. Iconic in popular culture, its menacing evil character, Leatherface, will forever be one of the most recognizable screen villains [right after Rebecca Gayheart in Urban Legends].
With 2003's remake of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre", starring Jessica Biel, the filmmakers at Platinum Dunes brought new life and vigor to the horror movie genre [thanks to the white tank top and tight jeans Biel sported], while also honoring its predecessor. Now the company continues on that path with a startling prequel, "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning", which details the beginnings of the Hewitt clan and exposes their psychotic idea of family fun [all that yelling and carrying on? They don't look like they're having fun]."
[Bracketed stuff added later by Octopunk,] because I freakin' hate ad copy. I used to write it for children's books, and it's such crap. Stick adjective A into slot B. I mean "iconic in popular culture"? Bleah.
1 comment:
Pff, that poster ain't scary. He's hugging the chainsaw! And it's all sepia-toned, like the beginning of Wizard of Oz. Actually, I think that's the cowardly lion.
Now I'm gonna go mess with that big dollop of industry ad copy JPX posted.
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