Thursday, October 29, 2015

Human Centipede 3: Final Sequence

(2015)
four.

We didn’t watch it for the sassy social commentary.

We didn't watch it for the killer's display of superior intellect.
We watched it for the execution of “medically accurate” ass-to-mouth surgery, to test our limits of watching human depravity at its best, to quench an insatiable thirst for sadistic sociopaths living out their fecal-filled fantasies, all at the location of one of America’s most well-attended facilities: a high-security prison, depicted here as the George H. W. Bush State Prison.

Amidst presidential hopefuls touting statistics that we incarcerate the most people, some of whom are minor drug offenders and some of whom would better fit in psychiatric hospitals, Warden Bill Boss (portrayed by Human Centipede antagonist Dieter Laser) and his trustworthy accountant Dwight Butler (Laurence R. Harvey, of Human Centipede 2 fame) successfully bring Tom Six’s vision of human poop-eating trains to a close in what I can only describe as cartoonish, disgusting and very, very awkward. I say it is cartoonish because both of these men -- one a lanky German method actor and one five-foot-two any way you measure him -- are acting their foreign hearts out to play American southern men with a thirst for torturing prison inmates. The archetype doesn’t seem too far from the truth, but the way they carry on their days as if they live at the prison couldn’t be further from it. Each day, Dwight tries to pitch his idea to make a human centipede to Bill, who’s not listening because he is thinking of creative ways to disembody the convicts.
Like its predecessors there are moments, things either said or done by one of these sadistic characters, that stays with you forever. Bill Boss’ preferred snack of choice (he says it gives him strength) is a running gag in the sense that it is ridiculous and it will make you gag just thinking of it.

7 comments:

JPX said...

I'm actually in the middle of this movie right now!

AC said...

More power to you! What a strong stomach you must have.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

I can't believe you scooped me by 40 minutes! O'well, nice review. Let's watch it again!

Catfreeek said...

Haha! Did Zeke watch it with you?

Johnny Sweatpants said...

Yes he did!

Catfreeek said...

Haha! Nice!

Octopunk said...

I can't believe JPX said he was in the middle of a Human Centipede flick and nobody teased him for being in the middle of a human centipede! It writes itself!

Excellent review, Crystal. The 5'2" crack joked me up.

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