Monday, October 12, 2015
In a post-nuclear holocaust world, our species is reduced to cave-dwelling barbaric tribes. Teenage caveman David is sentenced to death after murdering his rapist father, but is rescued by friends. Banished, they all head towards an abandoned city where they meet a couple who are immortal due to genetic experimentation. The couple introduces them to a hedonistic world of sex and drugs. The couple then try to pass their immortality on to the gang (it's sexually transmitted), but if it doesn't "take" then the human explodes. Oh, and one of the downsides of being immortal is that you occasionally turn into a raging green hulk-like creature. Sure it sounds laughably crazy but I'm giving you the abbreviated version, so just accept it, ok?
Director Larry Clark also directed the worst movie I've ever seen on a date, ever - Kids (about a teen who purposefully spreads HIV). He also directed Bully (a movie which I loved starring Brad Renfro about a group of teenagers conspiring to murder). With Teenage Caveman I feel he pigeon-holed himself as a director who solely specializes in shocking depictions of the youthful.
While imaginative, it is also a terrible, unconvincing world riddled with bad acting. The tribe leader has to be the shittiest, most uncharismatic cult leader I've ever seen. It's like watching Paul Reiser play Jesus.