(2001) **
Jesus fights vampires
More comedy than horror
A solid two stars
Some random highlights
But be warned: spoiler alert
Like you'd really care
Outside, the sign reads
"Lesbian Drop In Center"
Inside, vamps chow down
Shouting bible quotes
The film's narrator adds no
clarity at all
How does Christ unwind?
With sauna and massage from
Half-naked side kick
No match for vampires
Pro wrestler joins son of god
To turn tide of blood
Good shepherd saves flock
With his Kung Fu fighting skills
And stakes, lots of stakes
2 comments:
"Shouting bible quotes
The film's narrator adds no
clarity at all"
Hilarious! I'm really digging your haiku-reviews, Mr. AC. It kind of proves that many of these films are so bad that they can be summarized in 3 lines. I love your choice of pictures as well.
So lots of lesbians getting eaten, huh? =)
Oh my god, I think every lesbian in Ottowa gets screen time in this. They cut back and forth to different parts of the body-filled room like, a dozen times.
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