Firstly, here's the topic: If you could host a cocktail party and invite any guest, living or dead, who would you choose? Why?
Nextly, I'm still playing with the layout but the Haiku Hump Day Archive page is now fully operational. You're welcome.
Here's some fluff to flesh out this post.
You wake up in the middle of the night after hearing a disturbing sound coming from the basement. At first you dismiss it as your imagination but then it gets louder. As you listen more intently you determine that it is unmistakably the sound of an elderly woman laughing. You grab the baseball bat next to your bed, take a deep breath and slowly head down the stairs to investigate.
“Who’s there!?” you shout in your bravest voice as you reach the bottom step. You turn to your left and see none other than Millvina Dean, the recently deceased last survivor of the Titanic.
"But.. you're dead!" you exclaim. "You must be a... g-g-g-ghost!" Millvina finds this quite amusing for some reason and she cackles maniacally for about 20 seconds, though it feels like an eternity. The laughter is then replaced by awkward silence. Finally you muster up the strength to ask her why she has returned from the grave.
"I have the power to resurrect anyone who has ever lived and I want to throw a dinner/cocktail party", she explains. "Who would you like to invite, Cupcake?"
So that's the topic you waited an extra week for. It’s a question that you have probably been asked before but I suspect never in haiku form. Think about it. Who would you love to meet? Who fascinates you? Who could provide you with a deep understanding with their first hand account of to the past? Who would you like to see in the same room together? Who would be fun to get drunk and pass out in the hallway with? What would they bring?
Go!
First rule of Horrorthon is: watch horror movies. Second rule of Horrorthon is: write about it. Warn us. Tempt us. The one who watches the most movies in 31 days wins. There is no prize.
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Salem's Lot 1979 and Salem's Lot 2024
Happy Halloween everybody! Julie's working late and the boy doesn't have school tomorrow so he's heading to one of those crazy f...
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(2007) * First of all let me say that as far as I could tell there are absolutely no dead teenagers in this entire film. Every year just ...
46 comments:
i'd start with jesus
i know, agnostic jew here
but i have questions
and then socrates
wise, but also a wise-ass
and he loved his wine
amelia earhart
i bet she's a lively guest
loaded with stories
Lunch with George Lucas
A childhood dream come true?
A let down I'm sure
Lunch with Gene Simmons?
Instead of talking 'bout KISS
He'd steal Whirlygirl
With Mickey Dolenz
You'd be sure to have some laughs
He'd pick on Davey
Shakespeare, meet Paris
Here's a gun to shoot yourself
You'll thank me for it
Thank you Bea Arthur
This cheesecake is delicious
Have you met Dawkins?
Impress me Jesus -
Turn this water into wine.
Hmm. Just as I thought…
Had Shakespeare over
He pounded all of my wine
Dick jokes all night long
Invited Earhart
She said she'd be right over
Bitch never showed up
pryor, hedberg, hicks
morrison, hendrix, joplin
each with drug of choice
Shakespeare came to dine
slammed my place of employment
kill all the lawyers
Salvador Dali
Ate rice and melted my clock
With his heat vision
I'd want Del Griffith
Life of the party, that guy
Do the mess-around!
Gotcha good Reagan
Brought you back just to kill you
Enjoy your poison
I’d love to meet him
The first homo sapien
Probably hairy
Timothy Leary
Your Kool Aid tastes very good
The walls are breathing
I'd invite Lincoln
Hear truth 'bout those aliens
In "Area 4"
Last Supper re-do
Everyone sit on THAT side
Lean sideways & stuff
"We would be honored..."
A Sith Lord AND a good host
Cloud City dining
Is fictional good?
Rambo, Snake, Captain Nemo
Fight for last crumpet
Just invite Jesus
No need to grocery shop
Just bring fish & loaf
Justice League dinner
Who invited Aquaman?!?
I'm cooking seafood!
Check list: Bart Simpson
Elmo, and Monstro the whale
Now my chef hates me
Welcome, cast of Cheers
Your meal is right through this door
(Then I brick it up)
A drinking contest
Andre vs. Handsome Stan
Pay Per View worthy
Whole new direction
My Dinner With Andre II:
Liquid Dinner Death
I'd like to start with
Frank Zappa and Tipper Gore
let the games begin
Mix and match for fun
Howard Stern dines with Oprah
My money's on Stern
Jesus and Carl Marx
That's some conversation
Mixing church and state?
Welcome, Pac Family
Enjoy this platter of dots
Dessert: BANANA!
Hunter S. Thompson
Starts as a nice quaint dinner
wind up chasing bats
I'd like Stephen King
to tell campfire stories
then no one would sleep
For a real party
I'd invite Caligula
party animal!
Dine with Dracula
A bag of blood and a glass
means easy clean up
Frankenstein's monster
just don't light any candles
or he'll freak right out
Invited Noah
Couldn't wait for him to leave
He smelled like horse piss
Adam & Eve came
served them some hot apple pie
it's sinfully good
Then there was Judas
oh what a mistake that was
he just hung around
Darwin. Also God.
No awkward silences here
Let's sort this shit out
Invited Santa
Planned on a dinner for four
He brought 40 elves
Those fucking elf dudes
drank all my wine, screwed my cats
and clogged the toilet
Santa was laughing
Jolly old fart that he is
he came without toys!
Bringing back the dead
I'd like to meet John Lennon
Leave Yoko at home
Jerry Garcia
I'd break out the real good stuff
A baked jam session
Neurotic diners
Larry David with Seinfeld
and Woody Allen
Naked dream dinner:
Erin Grey, feed me more grapes.
Trinity, more beer.
John was a genius
But was known to be a prick
Lousy dinner guest
(My original intention didn’t include fictional characters but what the hell.)
Han Solo, Pee Wee
Batman, Dale Cooper, Satan
Abortion: discuss
Han Solo and Indy
Rick Deckard and Jack Ryan
And Doc Kimble. Cheers!
I heard that H Ford
Really likes the wacky weed
Good! No leftovers
fictional heaven:
nero wolfe, archie goodwin,
and fritz brenner cooks
awesome or awful:
sid vicious and sid barrett
and the two dead gibbs
I'd like to hang with
Austin Powers for a night
Ga-roo-vy Baybay
Forget the dinner
want a Willy Wonka tour
Lick some Snozzberries
Dinner with Aslan?
Better host, Mr. Tumnus
His crib was way cool
JPX nightmare
Dinner with the cast from Grease
Musical Mayhem
JSP Nightmare
A dinner with Nickleback
The Pope & JarJar
Ultimate dinner
with Millvina & Gretchen
oh the tales they'd tell
Worst party ever
Tom Cruise, Beck, L. Ron Hubbard
Not buying their shit!
Dinner with Gretchen
Little time, many questions
Please do not kill me
X-Men Thanksgiving
Pyro cooks, Wolverine carves
X thinks about stuff
Catfreeeek dream dinner
Romero, Craven, & King
And 8 talking cats
Stan's dream dinner date:
Quiet night with MrsX
Kidding. Really, KISS.
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