Monday, August 30, 2010

HHD Results! It's totally not a conspiracy!

Then again, maybe it is.

Quite a few magic bullets were fired; I loved how the varying degrees of opinion colored the overall bloggy knoll. Some of the gems:


toothpick thru sandwich
hits bread, meat, lettuce, toppings
a "magic" toothpick?

It's true! The conspiracy of the "magic bullet" depends on Connolly and Kennedy sitting on the same level and facing forward as the shots ring out. In truth, Connolly was sitting in the lower "jump seat," and, after the first shot, had turned his body in such a way as to account for all the wounds to both himself & JFK. "Back and to the left" is also hogwash; the first shot from the back made Kennedy tilt forward, allowing for the trajectory of the third, final bullet. But anyway, also from 50Page:

stan's conspiracy
picking a hump day topic
with four syllables



Elvis never died
Who really cares at this point?
He'd be an old fart

So true, so true

Also from JPX:

Know what's bugging me?
Why's Jersey Shore popular?
Yes, conspiracy

I have an elegant Theory of Superunification that explains EXACTLY why the show is so popular. I'll post it soon.


The Wookiee 7
Leave no clues for you to find
Except ripped-out arms

Loved this one - I was hoping for more backstory exploration of the Wookiee 7. Whose side are they on, anyway?

And I liked the following, even though I feel like the reference went over my head:

Easter Island heads
In collusion with mummies
Make air travel suck


a patient told me
"the damn jews own everything"
i wish it were true


Rich elite not smart
eliminate all the rest
who will wait on them

And in conclusion, the winner is Johnny Sweatpants.

You're far too trusting
There's no evil in the world?
Corruption exists

Well done, everyone! Watch out for the nWo black helicopters!


Johnny Sweatpants said...

Take that, bitches!

Octopunk said...

Well congrats Jessica Sarah Parkerpants, since you all decided to ignore my warnings.

I had thought about expanding upon the Wookiee 7, but I also liked the mystery.

I had a haiku about Thomas Pynchon's novel V in my "Leave your comment" box, but when I woke up on Thursday it was still there. It wasn't very good, but I wanted to give a shout out as it's about my favorite conspiracy ever.

Catfreeek said...

Congrats Sweatypants, you better come up with something good this week.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

Farting is going to be hard to top but I'll give it a shot. (Poop perhaps?)

Catfreeek said...

Anything to do with the ass in general is pretty funny.

AC said...

nice work pants!

great intro/outro as as always handsomestan.

JPX said...

I must admit (since Whirlygirl outed me), I watched and thoroughly enjoyed the first season of Jersey Shore. We're waiting for your analysis of the popularity of the show, Stan. Good work pants!