Saturday, October 02, 2010

Beware! Children at Play

(1989) *1/2

Dad and his mullet toting tot are having a great time bonding on their camping trip. The fish are jumping and the marshmallows are roasting. Life is grand. That is until Dad gets caught in a bear trap and slowly withers to death over a series of days. The food supply has dwindled down and Dad turned into a babbling idiot cursing the people who never came to look for them right before he passed on. Spouting some lines from a Grendel fairy tale story Junior raises the knife and carves into Dad for a nice juicy meal. Then we jump 10 years ahead. The town folks children have gone missing without a trace. Where could they be? Wait they're back, but now they're ravenous cannibals! Holy crap, it's a really bad film!! Aaaaaaahhhhhh!!!

This image is what sucked me into watching this crap fest.

I didn't have really high hopes for this film but I surely expected a little more than what I got. Growling grunting children and sorry eyed towns people who all hate the local sheriff. The sheriff who seems to be the only one who is actually looking for the children. At one point they call in a psychic who looks and acts like a bad knock off of a Liza Minelli impersonator. Man I couldn't wait for that bitch to die, thankfully it came pretty quickly. The film promises a “shocking ending!” Maybe I'm just desensitized, but their idea of shocking caused me to have a fit of giggling. My final thought, a fun time waster and that's about all.

5 comments:

Landshark said...

Man, that is a pretty disturbing image.

Octopunk said...

Yeah, between this and the baby's bottle full of blood, you're hitting some creepy homers.

This sounds like it's bad in the bad way, not the good way.

JPX said...

Hooray, the Cat is back to unearthing weird little films I've never heard of! I must admit, your description of the plot of this movie actually sounds pretty good. I'll defer to your judgment to avoid it.

Whirlygirl said...

I agree with JPX, your review has piqued my interest.

50PageMcGee said...

agreed on the disturbingness of the second pic -- of course we're talking 1989. no movie back then had the cojones to kill a kid like that.

we're living in special times, folks.

Malevolent

 2018  ***1/2 It's 1986 for some reason, and a team of paranormal investigators are making a big name for themselves all over Scotland. ...