After a British student discovers that the death of his father is related to six million dollars in Nazi gold hidden in the Sahara desert, he assembles a group of friends to retrieve the booty. I would have considered such a treasure hunt prohibitively dangerous even without flesh-eating Nazi zombies protecting it but Robert is clearly braver than me. The dangers posed by the military, dehydration, pirates and zombies don’t stop the gang from pursuing their goal, nor do they prevent everyone from getting nekked and making out awkwardly at any given moment. (The actors are so aware of the camera during the sex scenes that you have no choice but to turn away and blush.)
The Nazi zombies themselves are somewhat menacing despite the fact that the makeup appears to have been purchased at Spencer Gifts. (The paper machete over the eyes is a nice touch that gives the undead that “crusty” look.) Whenever the zombies appear, a highly irritating Ummugumma sounding organ is played.
Previously I used a bunk firework to describe the way Zombie Diaries fizzled out and I’m going to continue to drive that metaphor into the ground. Great zombie flicks and fireworks displays alike should culminate with a memorable grand finale. I am more than willing to devote an hour of my time to stock footage, poor acting and juvenile storytelling as long as I’m rewarded with a dazzling spectacle in the end. No such luck here. The ending is so forgettable that I forgot it, rewound it, watched it again and then forgot it again.
Finally I was miffed that there is an option to watch Oasis of the Zombies in its original French language and yet there are no subtitles available. Hence if you want to enjoy this movie and don’t speak fluent French, you must endure a piss-poorly dubbed audio track. The laziness of the voiceovers (picture the worst 70’s kung fu flick - it’s lazier) strips the movie of any dignity it may have once held.
The more I write about it the more I realize just how serious of an abomination this movie really is. And yet I can’t in good conscience give it less than **, simply because I was in the right mood at the time.
10 comments:
And here I thought that Dead Snow was so original with their nazi zombies. Now I'm wondering if they just stole the idea from "Oasis of the Zombies"?!?
Actually Shock Waves (1977) kickstarted the Nazi zombie craze. (Review to come.)
I came across this when compiling my French list, but I already had enough bad ones, so I decided this needed to be skipped. Yay Johnny for suffering through it!
"The ending is so forgettable that I forgot it, rewound it, watched it again and then forgot it again." My favorite line of the week. It's so true, some movie just don't imprint in your brain. I've had many films end where I must rewind because my mind refused to remain focused on what I was watching. I just watched Shock Waves, which I had to go back to 4 times, review to come some time soon...
That's my favorite line of the week as well. Funny thing is I totally get it, I've done that before.
The poster for this movie really threw me off. The pink silhouette of the girl looked like an oddly shaped nose - seriously, go check it out.
Annoying about the lack of subtitles. I pretty much can't handle even good dubbing, so pisspoor dubbing is way out.
DCD, that's hilarious! I thought it was a penis. I totally see now that's it's a shadow. Knowing the French, especially as I know them now, that is totally phallic. Even the part on the top of her hair resembles a hole. They so meant for this to be a penis. Sick bastards.
JSP, you watched it, so why is there a penis on the cover? Does this have any connection to the film? Not that the French need a reason.
Not surprising Whirly sees a penis, she's been watching porn all month long!
Holy jeez. I'm having this adventure combing through these old reviews and it's just highlighting what a great year this was. Whirlygirl's French horror porn-o-rama just keeps delivering!
JSP, I consider that "rewind the ending" maneuver to be a purely Horrorthon affair. Because if you didn't have to really watch the movie for a contest, you'd just leave it until tomorrow. But no, that'd get in the way of watching more horror...
For me it's dozing off every two minutes or so during the last fifteen minutes and having to go back multiple times to actually comprehend what's going on. That's why Horrorthon is not for the weak.
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