(2001) **1/2
I scooped this one up in the very broad net I cast with the DVR the other night to mark the start of Horrorthon. Mostly, I saw that it starred Rufus Sewell, who is usually pretty decent, so I thought it might be an underrated gem. It’s not quite a gem, but it definitely has a few merits. It was made as part of some HBO/Cinemax series where they remade old 50s B movies—the series was called Creature Features.
What’s interesting here, though, is that the creature is a hot bare-breasted mermaid who gets kidnapped by Sewell and his band of carnies who plan to use her to break into the circus business in America. Dragged into this plot is Sewell’s femme fatale girlfriend, Laura Gugino, who had been “playing” a mermaid in their carnival spectacle.
The overall feeling I got from this movie was that it was a near miss from being really good. First of all, I for some reason love horror movies done as period pieces. Not sure why that is exactly—does the attention to historical detail heighten the fantasy, trigger my suspension of disbelief mechanism? Maybe. Anyway, the setting is “1905, somewhere in Ireland” to start, but then the bulk of the movie takes place on a creaky ship sailing across the Atlantic. This actually leads to the biggest incongruity in the movie—the external shots of the ship are pretty realistic, but the interiors are ridiculously expansive. It’s a small 2-3 mast frigate with maybe a crew of 8-10, and yet inside there are passenger suites, wide hallways, voluminous cargo areas, and what appears to be a kickass pub/dining room. I kept thinking of Mary Poppins pulling all that shit out of her handbag.
The other thing I really liked about the movie is the look—the cinematographer chose some sepia-toned lens that captures the old monster-story vibe well. Unfortunately, the pacing of the movie can’t match the visuals or the quality cast—everyone is good, including some recognizable folks in bit parts, but the hottie playing the mermaid is particularly strong. But the carnage and suspense never really pay off, and there’s just too much “sitting around on a ship” for my taste, in the end.
6 comments:
As I started reading your review I kept thinking, did I see this or not? Once I saw the picture of the mermaid underwater it sparked some distant memory. I loved how you said, "I kept thinking of Mary Poppins pulling all that shit out of her handbag." Great review.
Seconded. I'm still chuckling over "a really kickass pub/dining room."
I half-watched this once, or watched half of it once, and your final assessment echoes my vague recollections. I totally missed the Tardis-like qualities of the ship.
And I hear you on period horror flicks. I'm in the middle of one now.
Thirded. Oh, I know it's not a word.
Both the Mary Poppins line and the "pub/dining room" made me laugh. And think, "that is exactly something Landshark would notice!"
Terrific summary, Landshark, it's nice to have you around this year! You note, "It was made as part of some HBO/Cinemax series where they remade old 50s B movies—the series was called Creature Features." This sounds great, I've never heard of this series. Is there an original Sea Creature?
You note that you like period pieces because it helps you, perhaps, to suspend disbelief more. I think this is why I love foreign horror so much. JUON is a creepy movie, but part of why its creepy is because it's set in a country I've never been to with a culture I have little understanding about. Whenever foreign horror films are remade I always think something is lost because of that foreign setting.
Hahaha, Mary Poppins for me too.
Also, you're looking to be quite a competitor this year. Does Catfreeek need to watch her back?
reading Landshark's comments and his reviews, it strikes me that he'd have supported my notion to review the porno version of the Addams Family for my first thon.
Post a Comment