Lake Placid 2

(2007)**

Sheriff John Riley (John Schneider) is investigating a series of deaths and injuries on Lake Placid, Maine. Years earlier the small town had to contend with some killer crocodiles and it appears that 4 of their offspring have grown to be mammoth-sized thanks to Cloris Leachman, slumming for Betty White as Betty’s sister. Cloris, you see has been feeding the crocs human bodies for reasons never explained and now they’re fucking huge. In the meantime a smarmy game collector arrives with an arsenal ready to claim one of the beasts for his trophy room. That’s about it. Watch as the Sheriff and game collector, along with a few others, team up to fight this terrible threat.

The original Lake Placid was no masterpiece, but I recall digging it for what it was, an animal run amuck flick. I recall thinking that Betty White was really funny playing against type, there was some pretty good crocodile action and the dialogue was of the tongue in cheek, wink, wink, ‘we know we’re in a silly movie’ style acting. Lake Placid 2 substitutes Betty White for Cloris Leachman (will Lake Placid 3 have Rhoda?) and the dialogue has been so dumbed down that even dumb people would be insulted (e.g., "I wouldn't let you rub my feet even if you were the CEO of Prada"). John Schneider, who never ages, does an adequate job with the material, but even Brando wouldn’t have been able to save this turkey, I mean croc. The greatest offense? The CG crocodile is so bad you’re never convinced that the beast is really there. There was one scene where I swear it looked like the croc wasn’t even touching the ground when he walked! This is what happens when you get a made-for-television movie for the Sci-fi Channel. Don’t get me wrong, it is entertaining at times and certainly worth a Horrorthon spin if you’re desperate to up your numbers, but Lake Placid 2 is no Lake Placid, and that’s not saying much at all.