If you like amusement parks, haunted houses, disposable teenagers and unsatisfying movies then look no further!
Following a half baked opening sequence in Africa involving a cursed monkey statue (to foreshadow the upcoming supernatural bullcrap), we're introduced to Hailey and Samantha - a pair of competitive stepsisters who resent each other. After a lame party, the two sneak into the "House of Fears" to catch a glimpse of the spooky theme park attraction before it's opened to the public.
Along for the ride are two horny guys and another couple whose names, faces and personalities escape me. While exploring the terrain, the gang divulge their deepest fears. One guy is afraid of knives (what a wuss), Hailey is claustrophobic and Other Girl is afraid of suffocating. Before the dialogue gets too unbearable they find themselves running for their lives, face to face with – brace yourself - the very fears they shared earlier. Can you freakin’ believe it? What are the odds!?
I'm always down for a mediocre haunted house story and House of Fears served up enough scarecrow, ghoul, house of mirror and psychotic clown moments to admittedly keep me entertained for an hour and a half. You're probably better off looking elsewhere though.
10 comments:
That is one ugly clown!
Seems like you've hit a patch of not-so-great clowntastrophes. I hope you hit clown gold sooner than later, although it's great to read the reviews either way. By the way, which character's deepest fear was clowns?
As far as I recall (and two days later I don't recall much) no one mentioned clowns. His crazy ass just showed up at the end. He's pretty cool looking though, isn't he?
Btw Mr. AC - can you send me the link again for the Gretchen ratings?
I'd be extremely wary of clown gold.
I'm also extremely wary of "whatever you're afraid of, that's what gets you." It is occasionally awesome, but usually laayaaaaame!
He is a very cool looking clown. Not quite as cool looking as Gretchen, though. Here's the Gretchy link:
http://home.comcast.net/~jalac/Gretchens.htm
You can also find the Gretchy link by clicking on the My Web Page link on my Blogger Profile Page
is that carrot top?!
has anyone else noticed mcgee has been exceptionally hilarious lately?
He does look like Carrot Top!
Spot on observation, 50! Hilarious!
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