Tuesday, October 04, 2011

The Ward



(2011) **1/2

Kristen awakes in an asylum (circa 1966) with no recollection of her life before hospitalization or why she is being held against her will in a sprawling, creepy institution. A therapy session with a psychiatrist yields very little and when pressed by her doctor she is only able to recall that she does not feel “safe”. Soon she is given the grand tour by a Nurse Ratched type who introduces her to the four other denizens of the grim ward. The other women are useless when it comes to providing any information but Kristen eventually befriends them and soon learns that 2 former patients went missing not long ago. With little else to do she decides to investigate their disappearances. Soon the other women begin to disappear and Kristen uncovers a horrifying truth about the ward.



What in the world has happened to the horror “masters”? A peek at the past 10 years reveals a sea of terrible product from Craven, Romero, and Carpenter. Somehow the old guard has been unable to keep up with the times and what we’re left with is clichéd, unoriginal films with little to offer to the hardcore fans. You have to go way back in Carpenter’s filmography to find his last fun film IMHO (Big trouble in Little China, 1986).


I hope they don't notice that I lost my touch

The Ward has the usual trappings of a movie cliché with its portrayal of a mental institution. The patients are a stereotype of every patient you’ve seen in these kinds of films. There’s Iris the artist, Emily the aggressive one, Sarah the impulsive one and Zoey the one with PTSD. At the end of the day The Ward ends up being less a horror movie and more of a Breakfast Club for nut jobs.



Apparently The Ward was in “limited release”, which is why I never heard of it. Usually “limited release” means “We have a piece of crap on our hands” and this is exactly what the studios must have concluded when they viewed Carpenter’s first new film in nearly a decade. The movie is chock full of cheap scares including people who suddenly pop up onto the screen and loud “scary” music that goes nowhere. There are moments when the film rises above schlock and some of the old Carpenter flourishes can be glimpsed (e.g. some excellent tracking shots) but for the most part the story is formulaic and rather dull despite its tight, fast pace. If you are patient enough to get through this there is a nice twist near the end that is probably the most interesting part of this film, but my guess is that most of you will have aborted before getting there.

8 comments:

Catfreeek said...

"Breakfast Club for nut jobs" ~ Yikes! That like alone tells me to stay far away from this one.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

I thought Prince of Darkness was great but that was from 1987. Everything John Carpenter has done since then is poop.

Catfreeek said...

I loved Prince of Darkness too.

Trevor said...

You beat me too it with this review. I watched this the other night. My wife figured out the "twist" at the end when they give you a clue about ten minutes in. So, even that wasn't much of a payoff.
I did really like the make-up job of Alice the ghost. But when she got all street fighter at the end, she got to be less scary.

Octopunk said...

"The Ward ends up being less a horror movie and more of a Breakfast Club for nut jobs."

Sick burn!

I said it on Trevor's review but it bears repeating: Carpenter did good with 1994's In The Mouth of Madness.

DKC said...

Yeah - that Breakfast Club line is a killer. Glad to know I can skip this one!

50PageMcGee said...

"but my guess is that most of you will have aborted before getting there."

something in that actually sounds like it'd be a ringing endorsement for a horror movie under other circumstances.

Johnny Sweatpants said...

Heh, "Breakfast Club for nutjobs".

Malevolent

 2018  ***1/2 It's 1986 for some reason, and a team of paranormal investigators are making a big name for themselves all over Scotland. ...